Nose Job Los Angeles

Non Surgical Rhinoplasty by Dr. Alexander Rivkin - non, surgical ...

This is an excerpt of the new Los Angeles of Alexander Rivkin MD demonstrating the Non Surgical Nose Job procedure that he pioneered. The procedure is the first non invasive alternative to traditional surgical rhinoplasty. It became popular because there are no surgical risks, swelling or bruising. It is one minute 15 office injection procedure that costs a fraction of the cost of rhinoplasty surgery.

Source: Non Surgical Rhinoplasty by Dr. Alexander Rivkin - non, surgical ...

iPhone Plastic Surgery Apps | Westside Aesthetics: Rhinoplasty Los ...

by Dr. Rivkin

I recently came across this - just wanted to share.

The link is: http://www.esarcasm.com/7220/nipped-tucked-8-new-iphone-plastic-surgery-apps/

The story you are about to read is not (entirely) true. However, it is more accurate than most things on network television.

We know your face is like five miles of bad road. You have a nose like a turnip, breasts as empty bags, and behind your ass like a bag of cats being dragged to river. But getting a total body Makeover is a big step. Why not first try on your iPhone?There are now two applications that allow you to consider what a new improved look like before you go under the knife. Reuters:

The Shafer Plastic Surgery App ... focused on patients who are modern "sophisticated, curious and seeking information, and it draws from a database of more than 1000 In Dover, iSurgery several promising applications are about to be introduced:

LipRip: The accelerometer-based app simulates real collagen implants making you bang the iPhone repeatedly against your lips until they swell up like Angelina. Although Brad will be deceived.

Mangina: Feel like you're a woman trapped in a man's body? With Mangina, you can at least pretend to have a hooh. Weenie's patented app-B-Gone technology makes any penis disappear when seen through the camera of the iPhone. Ideal also for jokes on friends really drunk.

ILASER: Getting rid of unwanted hair without expensive laser surgery. ILASER temporarily increased radiation level of the iPhone to put illegal "chemo", which guarantees the loss of follicles. Not recommended for use on the testicles and other body parts of a value.

DOJ: Named for the dear departed, the pop icon, the app cycles through a series of ever smaller alterations virtual nose until your nose looks like two holes in a bowling ball. Companion app simulates WhiteLikeMe bleaching your skin until it reaches a state of near translucence....

Read more...

vgplasticsurgery » Blog Archive » A Scarless Nose job - Closed ...

by admin

Nose reshaping or rhinoplasty is one of the most challenging procedures in plastic surgery. Every rhinoplasty patient requires a carefully thought out plan as each person has a different nose and face. Two rhinoplasty techniques are available closed and open rhinoplasty.

With open rhinoplasty an incision is made through the bottom portion of the nose (called columella) and the skin is moved back to expose the cartilages. Although open rhinoplasty offers great visibility, it leave a noticeable scar in many patients. Furthurmore, significant scarring has been seen in some patients resulting in thickening of the front portion of the columella. It is very difficult and sometimes impossible to revise a poorly healed scar.

In closed rhinoplasty  incisions are placed inside the nose and no scar will be present across the columella.  Healing followig closed rhinoplasty appears faster than after closed rhinoplasty.  With recent advances in closed rhinoplasty,  excellent results can be achieved with a high rate of consistency. Closed rhinoplasty is our preferred technique and our specialty.  Closed rhinoplasty requires special skills and experience.  A person considering rhinoplasty should be able to view as many rhinoplasty before and after photographs as possible to be able to assess the surgeon’s work.

Tags: closed rhinoplasty

Dr. Grigoryants Los Angeles cosmetic surgeon provides plastic surgery services throughout Southern California including Glendale, Burbank, Pasadena, Los Angeles, Encino, Huntington Park, Studio City, Arcadia, Montrose, Hollywood, La Crescenta, La Canada Flintridge, Valencia, Monrovia, Eagle Rock, Altadena, San Marino, Sherman Oaks, Thousand Oaks, North Hollywood, Long Beach, Beverly Hills, Van Nuys, Santa Monica, Calabasas, Palmdale, Fresno, Northridge, and Westlake Village, and Simi Valley

Source: vgplasticsurgery » Blog Archive » A Scarless Nose job - Closed ...

can someone tell me how mach it cost a nose job in los angeles area?

Mar 01, 2008 by extreme360 | Posted in Los Angeles

I had (2) The accidents of navigation, (2) Operations rhynoplasty / nose jobs. The first was for a Horizonal cut through the radius of my bridge, it was almost $ 6000., The second was for a water skiing Spearing me after having a front face slam into the water, which was a break to the right and was about $ 5000. They did a little more surgery, but I never say to each surgeon, I'd rather he do less than more. Every doctor is different, make sure it is with each board and association of plastic surgery because any old doctor can drums schnozola with your stories and say they do nose jobs.You do not want to end up a mess because you got a discount!

I'm looking for the best plastic surgeon in the Los Angeles area....looking to get Lipo and a Nose Job.?

Apr 08, 2007 by down_2_earth_35 | Posted in Women's Health

Looking for the best plastic surgeon in the Los Angeles .... looking to get lipo and a new nose.
If someone knows a great if not the best plastic surgeon for a nose job and liposuction. I live in Los Angeles. If you have had these procedures done or know someone else ... and are satisfied with your results ... Please share your experience, name of surgeon, and when we had done it.

I can not help you with names, but a good resource to find the name of the American Society of Plastic Surgeons. If you already have some names, check their website. Make sure they are board certified in plastic surgery. This means they have the appropriate training for the type of procedures they offer. Also, look at the pictures before and after having compared different doctors, you will start seeing a difference. I also suggest asking where the operation is conducted hospital or surgery center. Just how much research and are not just for the flashiest or most famous.Quantity does not necessarily Qualtity.

Octomom has 14 kids, had expensive IVF and nose job. How do you feel about your tax dollars going to that?

Feb 11, 2009 by Nicho | Posted in Politics

Nadya Suleman, the mother of the octuplets born last month, gets $490 a month in food stamps, the Los Angeles Times reported Monday evening. Three of her first children also get federal supplemental security income because they are disabled, the Times reported.

During an interview with Ann Curry on the TODAY show, Suleman denied being on welfare

I just feel so bad for the kids and their grandparents. They are here now and need support regardless of how selfish Nayda seems to be. It's so unfair to the children and the grandparents

Cost of Plastic Surgery in Los Angeles or Atlanta?

Nov 27, 2009 by * Seeking a Breakthrough * | Posted in Women's Health

I want...
1.) a nose job (fairly complicated). How much is it in Atlanta/and or LA?
2.) breast implants (gummy silicone)
3.) fat transfer from stomach to ass
4.) to fix a misaligned jaw (will insurance cover this)

Im willing to spend 20,000 for the first 3 and 10,000 for the last.
thanks
Please do not send me any of that "accept yourself" nonsense. Just answer my question. thanks :)

You can easily check your minimal health care rates in internet, for example here - health-quotes.talk4fun.net

rhinoplasty(nose job) fees?

Mar 28, 2008 by J W | Posted in Other - Health

how can i go about finding a good plastic surgeon with reasonable fees in Los Angeles? Internet is very tiresome to search and not very reliable...like is there any well known and competent doctors in LA that dont charge fees out of this world only cuz they are located in LA?

what i wanna do is my nose is kinda wide at sides and i wanna narrow it a bit

The best plastic surgeons are expensive. Especially because you are interested in rhinoplasty, you will want to find the best.

Is this what a nose job looks like?

Feb 28, 2009 by Haydavidley | Posted in Other - Skin & Body

Before:
http://cache.daylife.com/imageserve/0erL 1zQcbz04c/340x.jpg
After:
http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/L-MLNU-KI OS/Push+Los+Angeles+Premiere/5cfoKFfZyYq /Camilla+Belle

yes, a bad one.

OMG ASHLEY TISDALe.....?

Sep 14, 2007 by liz-beth | Posted in Celebrities

Got a nose job!!!!!!!, my mom is a nurse at Dr. ********** of Los Angeles office. She told me not to tell anyone but now I want everyone to know how fake she is.

omg its a nose so what its not gonna change the world and ur a big mouth

Best Places for Black Rhinoplasty in The US?

Nov 27, 2009 by * Seeking a Breakthrough * | Posted in Other - Beauty & Style

Im going to get a nose job in april 2010. that has been my set date since I was 15 years old and im 21 now. i need a surgeon who is really really good at black nose jobs (not removing my ethnicity--i dont want a white nose) and also reducing the potential for keloids or excessive scarring (since thats so common amongst blacks.) I wouldnt midn going to : Atlanta, Los angeles (esp), nyc or dc/maryland but ANYWHERE with a surgeon that good would be worth it.

Also, tell me the costs. Thank s

Iran.
It's the rhinoplasty capital of the world.

what do you think of my story so far continued?

Oct 23, 2009 by shelley14malham999 | Posted in Books & Authors

The man looked up with pleading eyes and said his last words “help us” and then the creature tore him to shreds, the creature came without warning it was quick and it was right there in front of me, my first sight of the creature it wasn’t anything normal it was gigantic, black fur soaked in blood and savage sharp teeth that was has long has a sharp kitchen knife his eyes were deep black and menacing, it was a werewolf a devils pet.
Questions were running through my mind, “What should I do?”, “What about my baby”, “How can I kill it?” “Do werewolves even exist?”
All I could think about now was me and my baby, by now both people would have dyed through a rapid loss of blood so all I can do now was run, run for my life and get help.
I ran has fast has my legs could carry me without looking back. Has I ran I scrambled in my pockets for my mobile, I suddenly came to a halt at the side of the road my hands were shaking and I thought I was finally out of reach from danger slowly my fingers typed the number 999 into the mobile I lifted the mobile up to my ear and then………
BLACKNESS.
The pain was excruciating, it hurt like a thousand of daggers, I could taste the blood in my mouth, I didn’t know what happened I didn’t know what time it was all I wanted to do was go towards the light, the beautiful white shiny light, I wanted to drift off into a deep sleep and never wake up, I was dying and I didn’t care, I had nothing left to live for……………apart from my baby. I heard people talking and saying will she live, is she alright, what happened, were did you find her. And then I was lifted from the cold hard ground into a bed and I was moving, I could here sirens, and could feel someone putting an oxygen mask to my face and injecting a needle to my arm and starting put more needles in my wrist and hand. I was scared, I wanted to get all the wires or whatever they were off me and go home and sleep and escape this nightmare, but I couldn’t move or talk or open my eyes, I was paralysed from head to toe, I felt blind and death at the same time. All I could do was listen to the doctors.
“What’s the details doctor” said one of the nurses
“4 broken ribs, a rapid loss of blood and she must have hit her head when she fell on a rock because she is unconsous, who knows if she will make it out a live” said the doctor
“How about the baby?”
There was a long pause and a sigh “The baby died there was nothing we could do to save her”
I wanted to cry but I couldn’t, I wanted to shout, of course they could have done something to save my beautiful baby girl, she can’t be dead, she’s all I have left to live for.
What hurt me the most was that I couldn’t cry, I so badly wanted to, I wanted to fell the wet tears drip down my face and hear my screams and sadness but I couldn’t because I was unconsous. I wanted to grab the doctor and tell him he should have tried harder I wanted too………… I wanted to die. Ive been through enough pain and its enough I don’t want to suffer anymore.
“There is a strong chance she will live if it was what we think attacked her. Did you contact any living relatives or found any information about her?”
“All her relatives are dead, her husband died 4 months ago, her name is Rose Spence and she is 23 years of age, her current employment is a secretary and she lives in Los Angeles”
“Good job, the other victims do you think they died because of the thing that did this to her, because if so then we might have some glimmer of hope for her.”
“I think so and so do the police; they think it was wild animal or a bunch of crazy people, they said 5 people died in the last 3 months always on the full moon and this makes it 7 and guess what it was a full moon last night but I think you already new that didn’t you, but guess what now they are calling rose here a suspect has she was there when the 2 people died and she is the only person to live.”
“Are they crazy they think she killed them people and then did something to her self so it wouldn’t look funny well personally I think there barking up the wrong end of the tree, why would she do that and kill her baby at the same time”
“They think she’s emotionally disturbed they think because her husband has died, her mam died when she was 16 in a car accident and her dad put a bullet in his mouth shortly afterwards that she might be the murderer, they think she might think that she lost people so why cant other people lose there loved ones.”
“That’s a load of bull, how can she kill those people?”
“Well doc we both know what really happened so cant you just calm down and drop the act.”
“How can humans be so stupid though, they don’t even know what’s really going on in there little precious world, there’s been unexplained killings out there and yet they lock up the innocent and through away the key, they don’t even know what’s going on underneath there noses, they don’t know what really exists there”
“Are we actually going to save her and let her become one of us, she’s not

"The man looked up with pleading eyes and said his last words “help us” and then the creature tore him to shreds, the creature came without warning it was quick and it was right there in front of me, my first sight of the creature it wasn’t anything normal it was gigantic, black fur soaked in blood and savage sharp teeth that was has long has a sharp kitchen knife his eyes were deep black and menacing, it was a werewolf a devils pet."

Seriously. This is ONE sentence. It's way too long and the punctuation you have is misplaced in many parts. Plus, you say creature three times in this part alone.

"All I could think about now was me and my baby, by now both people would have dyed through a rapid loss of blood so all I can do now was run, run for my life and get help."
- There are several errors here. You need to break this up into AT LEAST two sentences. You switch back and forth between past and present tense, and you spelled "died" wrong.

I would work on proper grammar and punctuation before you post something again...this piece needs a lot of work before it's anywhere near readable. Good luck though...

What Does this Dream Mean?

Feb 20, 2008 by CityGirl58 | Posted in Dream Interpretation

I live in Los Angeles & have been job hunting.
My Dream:
I was on the bus, we had to take a detour because of the Oscar set-up on Hollywood Blvd.
Alot of cute kids got on the bus, & the man they were with knocked me over, I had to move to a back seat.
There was a women on the bus , and I said "If I had known there would be so many cute kids, I would have started my own Modeling Agency"
I looked up and I didn't recognize the area we were in.
The bus driver went fast & went down a steep hill & almost hit someone on a bicycle.
Then I saw a sign "Wilshire Blvd", and I said "I am going to get off here because I know Wilshire Blvd". I got off, and we were in Little Korea Town, but it was right by the ocean.
I looked at the Ocean & I saw Penguins - I ran over to see the Penguins on the beach, and there was a performance going on. A famous singer was singing behind a glass booth, on the ocean. I sat down to listen, & the penguins really smelled bad, I had to cover my nose.

Since you are into job hunting. And that dream may have something to do with your background and situation now.

bus = decision making
move to the back seat due to people knocked you over = competition
woman on a bus = support
hitting a bicycle = wrong decision
getting off at Wilshire Blvd = seeking for safety zone
seeing penguins and famous singer = desire
penguins smell = helpless conscience

Now, let me put all together. You are into some stress in life. You may be uncertain about things you want to do. Projecting bus trip basically symbolize how you decision making is. In your case, it is more about job hunting. You may be feeling pressure because there are lots of people doing the same thing. Being knocked over and sat in the back show signs of passive action you are taking. In other words, you are trying to look aggressive enough. You tend to take your time to do it. The bus driver was running fast and hit a bicycle symbolize some wrong decision making you may have. You may miss some opportunity in reality. Projecting getting off the town you know symbolizes the things you are looking for. In other words, you may shorten the area you are looking for. You may be feeling uptight about competing with others. Seeing penguins and famous singer basically symbolizes your desire. However, due to the fact that some things in life you have to tolerate, you may be feeling helpless at the same time. That may hint about the connection you may have, but still you may be feeling helpless.

Basically you are venting out all your feeling about your current situation in dream.

Sign Humor. And I dont want to hear about how long it is. I can see it myself. Or about how much time i have.?

Oct 05, 2006 by JonnaMamma | Posted in Jokes & Riddles

A sign seen on a restroom dryer at O'Hare Field in Chicago: Do not activate with wet hands.
At a car dealership: The best way to get back on your feet? Miss a car payment.
At A Laundry Shop: How about we refund your money, send you a new one at no charge, close the store and have the manager shot. Would that be satisfactory?
At a Music Store: Out to lunch. Bach at 12:30. Offenbach sooner.
At a number of US military bases: Restricted to unauthorized personnel.
At a pizza shop: 7 days without pizza makes one weak.
At a Santa Fe gas station: We will sell gasoline to anyone in a glass container.
At a tire shop in Milwaukee: Invite us to your next blowout.

At a Towing Company: We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.
At a Used Car Lot: Second Hand cars in first crash condition.
At an Auto Body Shop: May we have the next dents?
At an optometrist's office: If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.
At the electric company: We would be delighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don't, you will be.
At the entrance of the large machinery plant: Warning to young ladies: If you wear loose clothes, beware of the machinery. If you wear tight clothes, beware of the machinist.
Billboard on the side of the road: Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs.
Car Lot: The best way to get on your feet....Miss a car payment.
Church sign: To remove worry wrinkles, get your faith lifted.
Door of a plastic surgeon’s office: Hello. May we pick your nose?
English Sign in German Cafe: Mothers, Please Wash Your Hands Before Eating.
Gym: Merry Fitness and a Happy New Rear!
In a Beauty Shop: Dye now!
In a cafeteria: Shoes are required to eat in the cafeteria. Socks can eat any place they want.
In a cleaner’s window: Anyone leaving their garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of.
In a counselors office: Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional.
In a dentist office: Be true to your teeth or they will be false to you.
In a department store: Bargain Basement Upstairs.
In a dry cleaner's emporium: Drop your pants here.
In a dry cleaner's window: Anyone leaving their garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of.
In a farmer’s field: The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but be aware that the bull charges.
In a Florida maternity ward: No children allowed.
In a health food shop window: Closed due to illness.
In a hotel during a conference: For anyone who has children and doesn’t know it, there is day care on the first floor.
In a Laundromat: Automatic washing machines. Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.
In a Los Angeles clothing store: Wonderful bargains for men with 16 and 17 necks.
In a Los Angeles dance hall: Good clean dancing every night but Sunday.
In a Maine restaurant: Open seven days a week and weekends.
In a New York medical building: Mental Health Prevention Center
In a New York restaurant: Customers who find our waitresses rude ought to see the manager.
In a non-smoking area: If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.
In a Pennsylvania cemetery: Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves.
In a Podiatrist's window: Time wounds all heels.
In a restaurant window: Don't stand there and be hungry, come in and get fed up.
In a safari park: Elephants please stay in your car
In a Tacoma, Washington men's clothing store: 15 men's wool suits - $100 - They won't last an hour!
In a Texas funeral parlor: Ask about our layaway plan.
In a toilet: Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.
In a veterinarian’s waiting room: Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!
In an office building washroom: Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.
In an office: After the tea break, staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board.
In an office: Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday kindly bring it back or further steps will be taken.
In downtown Boston: Callahan Tunnel - NO END
In front of a New Hampshire car wash: If you can't read this, it's time to wash your car.
In the front yard of a funeral home: Drive carefully. We’ll wait.
In the offices of a New Jersey loan company: Ask about our plans for owning your home.
In the vestry of a New England church: Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is extinguished.
In the window of a Kentucky appliance store: Don't kill your wife. Let our washing machine do the dirty work.
In the window of an Oregon general store: Why go elsewhere to be cheated, when you can come here?
Inside a bowling alley: Please be quiet. We need to hear a pin drop.
Maternity Clothes Shop: We are open on Labor Day.
Message on a leaflet: If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons.
Notice in a field: The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.
On a butcher's window: Let me meat your needs.
On a church door: This is the gate of Heaven. Enter ye all by this door. (This door is kept locked because of the draft. Please use side entrance)
On a desk in a reception room: We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left.
On a display of "I love you only" Valentine cards: Now available in multi-packs.
On a fence: Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive.
On a local plumbing company's trucks in NE Pennsylvania: Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.
On a Maine shop: Our motto is to give our customers the lowest possible prices and workmanship.
On a maternity room door: Push. Push. Push.
On a Music Teacher's door: Out Chopin.
On a New York convalescent home: For the sick and tired of the Episcopal Church
On a plumber's truck: We repair what your husband fixed.
On a repair shop door: We can repair anything. (Please knock hard — bell out of order.)
On a restaurant: Try our fish just for the halibut.
On a roller coaster: Watch your head.
On a Scientist's door: Gone Fission
On a taxidermist's window: We really know our stuff.
On a Tennessee highway: Take notice: when this sign is under water, this road is impassable.
On an electrician's truck: Let us remove your shorts.
On an established New Mexico dry cleaning store: Thirty-eight years on the same spot.
On an United Airlines emergency exit row instruction card: If you cannot read this card...
On another Butcher's window: Pleased to meat you.
On the door of a Computer Store: Out for a quick byte.
On the door of a Music Library: Bach in a min-u-et.
On the grounds of a private school in Connecticut: No trespassing without permission.
On the menu of a New Orleans restaurant: Blackened bluefish
On the wall of a Baltimore estate: Trespassers will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law. - Sisters of Mercy
Outside a country shop in West Virginia: We buy junk and sell antiques.
Outside a disco: Smarts is the most exclusive disco in town. Everyone welcome.
Outside a farm: Horse manure, pre-packed bags, $10. Or, do-it-yourself, $1.
Outside a Hotel: Help! We need inn-experienced people.
Outside a muffler shop: No appointment necessary. We heard you coming.
Outside a photographer’s studio: Out to lunch; if not back by five, out for dinner.
Outside a radiator repair shop: Best place in town to take a leak.
Outside a second-hand store: We exchange anything - bicycles, washing machines etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain.
Pizza shop slogan: 7 days without pizza makes one Weak.
Plumber: We repair what your husband Fixed.
Quicksand warning: Quicksand. Any person passing this point will be drowned. By order of the District Council.
Seen during a conference: For anyone who has children and doesn't know it, there is a day care on the first floor.
Sign at the psychic's Hotline: Don't call us, we'll call you.
This was seen on a car being towed by a large motor home: I go where I'm towed to.
Trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania: Don't sleep with a drip call your plumber.


========================================
International Signs (Mis-Translations)
========================================
Acapulco hotel sign: The manager has personally passed all the water served here.
Athens Hotel: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 daily.
Athens, Greece hotel: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.
Austrian hotel catering to skiers: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.
Bangkok dry cleaners: Drop your trousers here for best results.
Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.
Belgrade hotel elevator: To move the cabin, push botton for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.
Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
Copenhagen airline ticket office: WE take your bags and send them in all directions.
Czechoslovakian tourist agency: Take one of our horse-driven city tours--we guarantee no miscarriages.
Denmark: in a Copenhagen airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions.
Finnish washroom faucet: To stop the drip, turn cock to right.
German/Austria: a sign in a hotel catering to skiers read Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.
German/Germany: in a Leipzig elevator: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.
Germany's Black forest sign: It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose.
Hong Kong supermarket: For your convenience, we recommend courageous, efficient self-service.
Hong Kong tailor shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs.
Istanbul hotel corridor sign: Please to evacuate in hall especially which is accompanied by rude noises.
Japanese hotel room: Please to bathe inside the tub.
Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.
Japanese information booklet about a hotel air conditioner: Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of war in your room, please control yourself.
Kyushi, Japan Detour sign: Stop: Drive Sideways.
Leipzig elevator: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.
London department store: Bargain basement upstairs.
London office: After tea break staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board.
Majorcan shop entrance: English well talking.
Majorcan shop entrance: Here speeching American.
Moscow hotel lobby across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists and writers are buried daily except Thursday.
Moscow hotel room door: If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.
Norwegian cocktail lounge: Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.
Paris dress shop: Dresses for street walking.
Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk.
Rhodes tailor shop: Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.
Roman doctor's office: Specialist in women and other diseases.
Rome laundry: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.
Sweden: in the window of a Swedish furrier: Fur coats made for ladies from their own skin.
Swiss mountain inn: Special today -- no ice cream.
Thailand: an ad for donkey rides asked Would you like to ride on your own ass?.
Tokyo bar: Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.
Tokyo hotel: Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read this notice.
Tokyo shop: Our nylons cost more than common, but you’ll find they are best in the long run.
Vienna hotel: In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the hotel porter.
Vienna, Austria hotel: In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the hotel porter.
Yugoslavia: a sign in a hotel read The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid. Turn to her straightaway.
Yugoslavia: in the Europa Hotel, in Sarajevo, you will find this message on every door: Guests should announce the abandonment of theirs rooms before 12 o'clock, emptying the room at the latest until 14 o'clock, for the use of the room before 5 at the arrival or after the 16 o'clock at the departure, will be billed as one night more..
Zurich hotel: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.
I know they repeat themselves. I got this off of a web site and i copy and pasted it!!!

Some of my favorites from the local papers...

"Is your child ready for a bigger bike? Sell the little one in the shopper"
"Free sheep (2). Ewe catch."

I bought the new car but it was salvaged...so..?

Oct 17, 2007 by Goyah | Posted in Buying & Selling

I bought the honda accord EV(Special edition) of 2006 new model with 60mi of mileage and it was good going 'til I got
an accident on last thurs. Therefore, my front bumper got messed so bad and I went to a major body shop in Los Angeles. But the problem's the owener of that body shop asked me did I got any big accident since I bought my car but I haven't. So, he said my car had a pretty big accident to see the inside of front bumper(the main frame of front-nose side) and everybody who works in this engineering job will know obviously that it's salvaged and he suggested to ask at the dealership that I bought my car so I did. It's the Union Motors by Mitsubishi and I asked to transfer me to the salesman who I bought from but there's all member are changed. ehrrrrrrrrrrrrr..... sorry for messes of my letters.. i just got tangled in my head.... so, anybody know what should I do?
please.. help me ;'[

You gotta report this to the DMV.

elvis alive?

Aug 20, 2007 by chris c | Posted in History

The only time I feel alive... is when I'm in front of my audience, my people. That's the only time I really feel like I'm human."

"Long after I'm gone, what I did today will be heard by someone. I just want them to get the best of what I had." (Elvis Presley)


Is Elvis Alive ?

There are many reasons to believe that Elvis Presley is dead. When the only arguments to believe otherwise come from crazed fans and supermarket tabloids, it is easy to dismiss the possibility that Elvis is still among us. However, the circumstances surrounding Elvis' alleged death are quite mysterious and beg closer attention. As it turns out, there are many concrete reasons to believe that Elvis is still alive.



The Gravesite.
Elvis' name is misspelled on his headstone. Elvis' full name is Elvis Aron Presley, but on his grave his middle name is spelled incorrectly with two a's. His father would not have let this happen. When Elvis was born, his name was misspelled on his birth certificate, and his father went to great lengths to get it put right. The unique spelling of Elvis' name was important to his family.

Elvis' current "resting place" is in between his father and his grandmother and not next to his mother where he had adamantly requested. It is doubtful that the people close to him would allow these things to happen. Elvis is a superstitious man, enough so that he wouldn't tempt fate by putting his real name on a tombstone, or violate the ground next to his mother until he was ready to be placed there for good.

Death Certificate.
Elvis was very vain, and he was embarrassed about his recent weight gain, an astonishing 50 pounds in the month before his so-called death. Even though he weighed about 250 pounds at the time of his "death," his death certificate lists him at a spry 170 pounds. The original death certificate disappeared, and the current death certificate is dated two months after his alleged death.

The Wax Body Theory.
This argument is very convincing when the facts are considered. Elvis' coffin required several pall bearers because it weighed 900 pounds. Attendants of the funeral reported that the air around the coffin was rather cool. It is suspected that the coffin contained an air conditioning unit to keep a wax body cool, a wax body that was a replica of Elvis designed to fool funeral-goers. And how did the Presley family get a 900 pound, custom made coffin ready for a funeral that was held on the day after his death? It takes a lot of time to build such an elaborate coffin.

And why was the funeral so quickly? Some say that the immediacy was intended to make it as difficult as possible for the people who were Elvis' biggest fans to attend the proceedings. It could be a concern that they might recognize the flaws in the wax replica.

Elvis was an 8th degree black belt whose hands were rough with calluses, yet the body in the coffin had hands that were soft and pudgy. The body in the coffin had a pug nose and arched eyebrows {unlike Elvis} and most importantly, one of the sideburns on the "corpse" was loose and falling off. A hairdresser later reported gluing the sideburn back on the body.

Unusual Behavior.
Two hours after Elvis' death was announced publicly, a man who reportedly looked remarkably like Elvis purchased a ticket for Buenos Aeries, paid in cash, and used the name John Burrows: the same name Elvis had used as an alias several times before.

Elvis had a few books that were considered to be his most prized possessions. He had a bible, several pharmaceutical books, books on death, and most importantly Chiro's Book of Numbers and The Autobiography of Yogi which I will explain more about later. After Elvis's death was announced, these books disappeared and were never recovered.

In the weeks preceding his alleged death, Elvis' actions were not those of a man who was about to embark on an extensive US tour. He ordered no new suits despite having gained 50 pounds since his last tour, and he bid "adios" at his last show in Hawaii. He had never done this before. Adios, like the French adieu, has the significance of being a final good-bye as opposed to an "I'll be seeing you on my next tour" kind of good-bye.

Others were intrigued by Elvis' decision to sign a lucrative TV deal with NBC that would cover the tour. It was unprecedented for a network to pay such a large amount up front, in cash, for such a deal. Many wonder why Elvis even agreed to the deal since his vanity discouraged him from making public appearances due to his weight gain.

RCA showed uncanny and unbelievable foresight by mass producing millions of Elvis' current and previous recordings and merchandise. This is standard practice for an act that is about to go on tour, but the numbers in this case were beyond reasonable expectations. The announcement of Elvis' death caused record sales to skyrocket.

Elvis did other unusual things that created suspicion. First, he fired several employees that he had relied upon for a long time. Also, two days before his alleged death, Elvis telephoned a friend of his named Miss Foster. He told her that he wasn't planning on going on the upcoming tour. She asked him if he had canceled it, and he said that he had not. When she asked if he was ill, he said that he was fine, and that she should not ask any more questions or tell anyone anything, and that she should not believe anything she read. He told her that his troubles would all soon be over, and that he would call her in a few weeks. The author of Elvis Where Are You? writes that Miss Foster took a polygraph test regarding this story, and that she was not lying.

The day after Elvis' alleged death, a woman named Lucy De Barbon, a former lover of Elvis, received a single rose in the mail. The card indicated that the flower was from "El Lancelot." This had been her pet name for Elvis, and it was a name that no one else knew. Flowers can't be sent from beyond the grave. This was Elvis' way of letting her know that he was not dead, even though he didn't want to be found.

Chiro's Book of Numbers.
Elvis had a fascination with numerology, an interest he fed by reading Chiro's Book of Numbers. The theory that Elvis orchestrated his death is further supported when considering the significance of the date of his alleged death. The date in question is August 16, 1977. By adding the numbers in the date, 8, 16, and 1977, you get 2001. This is the title of Elvis' favorite movie in which the hero plans his immortality in the bathroom. Elvis spent a considerable amount of time doing the same: planning his afterlife on the toilet.. Elvis spent so much time in the bathroom that he had his toilet converted into a reclining comfy chair. Coincidentally, the bathroom is also where Elvis' body was reportedly found.

Given Elvis' religious beliefs, he had a fascination with things that come in threes, for example, father, son, and holy ghost. The sum of the digits from his favorite film (2+0+0+1) is three. Let's consider the triad of the repetition of the number 24. 2001 (favorite film) less 1977 (year of death) is 24. The two numbers from the day of death (8/16) when added up equal 24. The sum of the digits in the year of death (1+9+7+7) also equals 24. That is 3 occurrences of the number 24 which is divisible by 3, and when divided by three the result, 8 has a perfect cubed root (2x2x2=8).

Elvis loved numerology, and when you consider the numeric significance of the date of his alleged death, it is clear that if indeed he did plan to fake his death, he could not have chosen a better date.

Reason
Elvis had many reasons to fake his death.It has been said that Elvis' life was in danger. He had recently lost $10,000,000 in an airplane/real estate deal with a California based organization called the "Fraternity" that had links to the Mafia. It is speculated that he corroborated with the government to expose the organized crime ring in exchange for protection, perhaps in the form of a new life and identity compliments of the Witness Protection Program.

Elvis was a prisoner of his own fame. He had many other reasons to leave his life behind. Because of his incredible popularity he recieved several death threats, and he was concerned about the safety of his ex-wife and daughter. Sometimes when he wanted to leave Graceland he would send look-alikes out to distract would be followers. Elvis was also known to ride in the trunk of someone else's car to avoid being seen. Once, when he fell ill in Las Vegas, he couldn't get proper medical attention because the hospital was overwhelmed by fans.

At the time of his alleged death, Elvis thought he was nearing the end of his career. He saw his self as 42 with greying hair, overweight, and he thought his voice was starting to weaken,. He was going down hill, and he was too proud to go out with a whimper. He would never want his fans to see him in such an unhealthy condition.

Elvis had shown a fascination with death on several occasions. In the days leading up to his alleged death he was reported to have visited funeral homes at odd hours of the night with close friends. Was he doing research? Elvis once faked his death by setting up an elaborate shooting in which a would be killer fired blanks at Elvis who had a blood pack which he discharged. It was Elvis' intention to see how the people closest to him would react to his death. Perhaps what he learned convinced him to do it for real.

Finally, one of Elvis' favorite books is the spiritual Autobiography of Yogi. One of the central themes of this book is the relinquishing of one's wealth and earthly possessions to achieve spiritual oneness. Elvis could do this, as well as address his other concerns of sanity and safety by faking his death and living in exile.

Means.
Elvis had the means to fake his own death. He is accused of destroying himself with drugs. In reality, Elvis was a pharmaceutical expert. He took a lot of drugs, but he knew what he was doing and was extremely careful. He knew what drugs he could self-administer to create a deathlike state. Also Elvis' experience with the martial arts was such that he could slow his heart rate and breathing in order to feign death.

Elvis' manager, Colonel Tom Parker, had once created a new identity for himself. He came to America as an illegal immigrant from Holland, but through various connections managed to create a new identity complete with a passport, birth certificate, drivers license, and social security number. He would have known how to give Elvis a second life.

Aswell as Elvis' ties to the government through his testimony against the "Fraternity", Elvis was known to interact with the President of the United States. He was reported in government documents to use the name John Burrows as an alias when he wanted to travel. Some people believe that Elvis worked for the government as a drug agent. He did, after all have extensive contact with many people in the music business who, as we know, tend to dabble in illegal substances. And, of course, we must allow that Elvis' connections to the government gave him access to the Witness Protection Program. If they can turn the Simpsons into the Thompsons, they can relocate anybody.

Orion?
Many believe that Elvis couldn't have given up performing completely. Just imagine, after a while the desire to perform would grow once he started his life in exile. The story of Orion supports the theory that Elvis attempted a secret comeback.

Shortly after Elvis' alleged death, a masked singer by the name of Orion emerged on the scene. He was big like Elvis, and he sang just like Elvis. Because of the mask no one could tell his true identity. One fan described seeing Orion from near the stage. She claims that Orion left the stage between songs, and when he appeared moments later the sweat was gone from his armpits and back and she thought that his costume looked slightly different. After the song he left the stage, and the original Orion returned.

Another fan described how she rushed into a tour bus at an Orion show only to see two Orions in the back of the bus. She claimed that one ducked into the bathroom before she could get a good look at him, but he appeared to look like Elvis Presley.

What's even more remarkable is the fictional story called Orion that was written by Gail Brewer-Georgio about a legendary performer who had several identities and wanted to fake his death. The story was written and submitted to the William Morris Agency for publication consideration after Elvis' alleged death and before the real Orion ever performed. As it turns out, there are many ways in which the real Orion mimicked the events as described in the book. For example, the performers' managers had the same name. Also, without knowing it, Brewer-Georgio wrote of events in Orion that had actually taken place in Elvis' life. It was a case of life imitating art.

Picking up the Pieces.
In 1981, 20/20 did an investigation into the circumstances surrounding the alleged death of Elvis Presley. The investigative report was very convincing. Oddly enough, within two weeks of the report, the singer, Orion, disappeared and was never heard from again. The book, Orion disappeared from shelves across the country. It had been recalled by the publisher which was associated with the William Morris Agency. Incidentally, the William Morris Agency is the same agency that represented Elvis.

It seems that Elvis Presley is worth more dead than alive. By faking his death and relocating with a new identity he is safe from his fans and the "Fraternity", the government can make a solid case against the organized crime ring, and RCA, Elvis' family, and Elvis' management can all reap immense financial benefits from the attention. That is... except for one benefit....after nearly 25 years no one has collected on his life insurance policy.

Why ?????

During his last concert tour in 1977, Elvis spoke of "not looking good tonight", but, he would look good in his coffin. He made comments of being tired of living as he was and how it was going to change. He told of how he would like to be just himself instead of an "image".

On August 16th 1977, at 8:00 A.M., Elvis told Ginger Alden that he was going into the bathroom to read. (This bathroom/lounge had it's own back entrance.) For the next six hours no one saw him. Elvis signed for a special delivery letter at 9:30 A.M. At 2:00 P.M. Ginger Alden found the apparent body of Elvis lying on the floor in front of his chair, where he had been reading. She called Al Strada who in turn called Joe Esposito. George Nichopoulous (aka Dr. Nick) was then telephoned. Joe called the fire department, unit 6. The ambulance arrived at Graceland at 2:33 P.M. Paramedics administered CPR, despite rigor mortis. The body was taken to Baptist Memorial Hospital at 2:48 P.M. By 3:00 P.M. Elvis' family members and friends were informed of his "death". Public announcement was given at 3:30 P.M.

August 17th, the body was brought back to Graceland for family viewing. The public viewing was from 3:00 P.M. to 6:30 P.M. On August 18th,1977. Tennesse Governor Ray Blanton ordered flags to be flown at half-mast for the duration of the funeral procession. At midday the Graceland gates swung open, a white Cadillac hurse rolled through them, followed by sixteen white Cadillac limousines.

QUESTIONS BEGIN
How could it take twenty minutes for paramedics to drive sixteen blocks to Graceland if the call came in at 2:33 P.M.? The Medical Examiner's Report states that the body was found with rigor mortis, while the police report states "unconcious". Why would anyone try to give CPR to a rigor mortised body ? The ME report listed the body as weighing 80 pounds lighter then Elvis' actual weight. How could Elvis have passed a physical exam just prior to August 16th if his heart was so enlarged ? How could he have played raquetball for several hours on August 16th, just before his "death" ?

ABC's 1979 program on the cover up of Elvis' death stated that all the stomach contents were destroyed. Bill Burkin in his book Elvis World states that officials at Babtist Memorial Hospital had assured him that the stomach contents had been shipped to a California lab to be examined and then on to a lab in Utah, and then ? There are rumors of Elvis' "death" being caused by a heart attack, drug overdose, suffocation in carpeting, suicide and even cancer ! Persons in attendance at Graceland at the time of "death" don't agree on the color of pajamas Elvis was wearing or the posistion of the body.

Why did Vernon ask many people NOT to attend the funeral but to come a week later ? Why did Vernon refuse to accept the flag which is usually given to dead war veterans ? Why didn't Elvis have any new jumpsuits made during 1977 ? The handwriting on the death certificate matched Elvis' own writing !

Elvis was very aware of which presribed drugs did not mix well with others. Elvis had glaucoma, and Dexedrine, a drug not to be taken with that condition, was listed as being in his system. Who would prescribe it and why would he take it ? Whose body was autopsied ? Funeral homes don't usually keep solid copper coffins in stock. These coffins weigh in the area of 300 pounds and usually take two months to receive once ordered. This coffin seemed to have been ready.
Monte Nicholson, a nineteen year veteran of the Los Angeles Sheriffs Department, wrote a novel called The Presley Arrangement. This novel tells the story of a body that is autopsied, a man resembling Elvis. The man had died of cancer. The body is later returned for private burial, to the man's own family. The man's family are paid to remain silent about the incident. Nicholson explains a government connection. In a 1989 radio interview Nicholson said that even if he knew there was an FBI connection and was told not to say anything, he COULD NOT say. Nicholson also claimed that if he knew the answer to the question, and says he does, he will not disclose his knowledge. He said that if Elvis is alive that his book is pretty close to the truth of what REALLY happened.

Was Elvis a DEA (Drug Enforcement Agency) agent ? Elvis can be seen wearing a DEA Staff jacket in several photographs, including one taken in June of 1977, approximately six weeks before his "death". Also Elvis was wearing a jogging suit with the DEA logo on it during the early morning hours of August 16th 1977.
When Elvis met with President Richard Nixon he said he had been "studying" the drug culture for over 10 years, he could get into any culture group and be accepted. Elvis said he had gotten alot from the country and he wanted to repay in some way. It would have been a dangerous job and one that an entertainer such as Elvis would not have HAD to do unless he chose to. Many DEA agents pose as "drug users" and "pushers" in their undercover work. Elvis could get to anyone if he appeared to be a "user". In the book Elvis: What Happened? one of the guys wondered if Elvis was ever as whacked out as he seemed to be. Maybe he is a "great" actor after all. Perhaps he deserves an "Oscar".

Death threats were issued against Elvis and his family. Those who had leveled those threats had actually broken into Graceland. At times, the FBI were called. Deputy Narcotics Director John Finlator arranged for Elvis to come to his office under the name of John Burrows. Finlator didn't want to give Elvis a badge but the President reversed the decision.

On December 21st of 1970, Elvis met with President Richard Nixon in the oval office, Washington, D.C. Elvis had written a letter requesting a meeting and expressed his concerns about the drug culture, hippie elements, the SDS and other groups who were against the establishment. When Finlator finally gave Elvis the badge and promised to issue him consultant credentials, Elvis was overcome with emotion and his eyes became misty. Ten days later he met with the FBI. On the same day, President Nixon wrote Elvis a thank you. Elvis wrote to the President and said, "I can and will do more good, if I were made a Federal Agent at large, and I will help out by doing it my way."

Elvis was known to be in his bedroom for weeks, seeing no one. (There was a back staircase at Graceland.) Elvis could sneak out whenever he needed to.
Department of the Treasury-Bob Pritchett says that during the years of '74, '75, and '76 "Mr. Presley provided one of our undercover agents, who was a musician, a job cover. Undercover agents appear to have other occupations. None of Elvis' group of friends knew of this agent and the role he played in setting up his cover. Since he had an undercover agent in his group from '74-'76, when did he find time to use drugs himself? Elvis was very good at keeping secrets and living a "double life".

Elvis spoke with President Carter two weeks before his death. It involved aid to a friend. On August 16, 1977, President Carter issued this tribute:
"Elvis Presley's death deprives our country of a part of itself. He was unique and irreplaceable. More than twenty years ago he burst upon the scene with an impact that was unprecedented and will probably never be equaled. His music and his personality, fusing the styles of white country and black rhythm and blues, permanently changed the face of American popular culture. His following was immense and he was a symbol of good humor of his country."
This was a formal statement, when a celebrity's death is usually only commented on. He had spoken to Nixon and Carter both shortly before the day he died.
In the September 1988 issue of American Karate magazine, Ed Parker tells of a time when a terrorist group threatened Elvis' life to make him an example of how they could get to famous people. They threatened to plant a bomb in one of the gifts offered to Elvis at a concert. This was a threat as long as he was "alive", and his family were targets also.
Elvis always had law enforcement officials around him. John O'Grady, who was earlier in charge of NARC Divisions of the LAPD, was one of them. He also hired Dick Grob, a former sargeant with the Palm Springs Police. He was surrounded by at least two lawmen in top security positions. Elvis was in danger. The "hoax" may have been the only way out! History will prove Elvis to be an American hero beyond being an American entertainer.

SIGHTINGS
With all the Elvis lookalikes, he could actually walk around using disguises and get away with it. Who would be looking for him anyway, when he is supposedly dead? Before 1977, there was an "Elvis lookalike, sound alike" at a Memphis theatre. Elvis put on his best "Elvis outfit", strolled in and mingled with the clones, doing his best "Hey, baby". Afterwards, he came back to Graceland laughing. He tried out and lost!
Elvis and his mother's bodies were moved to the Meditation Gardens for burial, after three men tried to break into the crypt. Graceland was rezoned to permit burials at the estate. In the 1989 Orion's "Farewell to the King", the King says "I died once. I had to be willing to give up everything, even the will to live." The last recording session at Graceland was The Last Farewell.
There have been many sightings at various places including Graceland. There are some escape routes at Graceland that people don't know about.
In a syndicated newspaper across the nation on June 5, 1990, an article headlined "Elvis Lives, At Least On Census Form." The Census Bureau reported in 1990 that Elvis returned a questionaire to the bureau office in Huntsville, Alabama. It was noticed by census workers who were screening forms for completednesss.
Late Night with Ross Shafer (August 1988) had a survey that showed that out of 30,000 people polled, approximately 84% believe Elvis is alive.

On Monday, August 22, 1988, Harold Schuitmaker, in an item of the Detroit News, said "Elvis is Alive and Living in Kalamazoo." Schuitmaker was a well known Michigan politician and resident of Paw Paw (15 miles from Kalamazoo).
The masked singer Orion was at the McMinnville Civic Center and a fan said that she felt that the man onstage and the one who signed autographs were different people. People have reported that someone sounding like Elvis called them on the phone and some hung up because they couldn't believe it.
A book titled Elvis: Where Are You? came out of Wilton Manors, Florida around August, 1982 under the name of Al Jefferies. The premise of the book was that Elvis hoaxed his death. Kelly Burgess, a former assistant editor and feature writer with the Detroit News, claimed to have seen Elvis in Kalamazoo, Michigan. She is not living now.
In 1988, Heartbreak Hotel starred David Keith as Elvis. (The film had the support of EP Enterprises.) A soundtrack album thanked Jerry Schilling and a special thanks to J.B.
In 1987's Robo Cop, a cop is killed, but didn't die. He returns as Robo Cop-a superman hero. It was filmed in Michigan. During that time radio stations got calls from a man sounding like Elvis Presley. There have been lots of sightings there and it was also on his final concert tour. Is this possibly a "message" film?
March 18, 1990, an article on Robo Cop, in the Detroit News told of Robo Cop speaking to a Boys and Girls club against drugs. It was a three month long anti-drug campaign organized by the FBI, Orion Home Video of New York, and the Boys Club of America. This Robo Cop was not the same actor as in the movie-his true identity was not revealed. he was a special agent helping the FBI fight the war on drugs. His suit was bullet-proof. During filming, some people saw a man looking like an older Elvis.
In Mac and Me, a film from 1988, a young alien is lost and at the end the family drives away in an old pink Cadillac convertible. A balloon caption says "We'll be back". The sound track is on Curb Records, which is the same label as "Spelling on the Stone". There were some song lyrics which were: "Tired of being myself, being different from everyone else, somehow you knew I needed your help, be my friend forever. I never found my star in the night; living my dream was far from sight." There was a scene in the movie where Eric asks Debbie "Why didn't you tell him that you saw him (the alien)?" She says, "Because no one would believe me."
Elvis has become a mythic figure, and there have been frequent rumors that he is still alive. Elvis remains the single most influential and respected figure in the history of Rock music. Elvis was the first Rock/Pop singer to have a single record sell a million copies, the first to go platinum with an album in less than two weeks, the first singer to pre-sell a million records before it's release, the first entertainer to earn a million dollars for one concert performance, and the first young, white, southern male to bring international attention to the importance of black rhythm and blues. He was the first singer to get a million dollar screen contract. He was the first music personality to have a TV performance broadcast worldwide via satellite.
In 1993, he became the first rock'n'roll star whose picture appeared on a commemorative U.S. Postal stamp (the largest stamp printing in history). Elvis is a landmark in almost everyone's life, going back to distant memories of watching him above the waist on Ed Sullivan or hearing "Hound Dog" for the first time. His image continues to mesmerize: witness the appearance of 200 Elvis impersonators at Liberty Weekend in 1986.
There was a time when he was merely the most popular entertainer in history. He is more than that now. He is a symbol of America as recognizable as the flag. Elvis opened the 'window of his soul' to his fans all over the world.

Thank you, Elvis! Remember you are always on our minds. "TCB FOREVER!

Any Comments on this ? E-mail Me
i found this on the internet weird

Elvis is dead. Autopsy performed. Death certificate issued. A conspiracy of the magnitude described in the article would require the cooperation of an extraordinary number of people. It defies all reasonable logic to state otherwise.

Why are there so many scientific and historical innacuracies in the word of your God?

Jun 23, 2006 by pope | Posted in Religion & Spirituality

Science and History in the Bible
All fowls that creep, going upon all four, shall be an abomination unto you.--Lev.11:20

Arguments cannot be answered by personal abuse.... Should it turn out that I am the worst man in the whole world, the story of the flood will remain just as improbable as before, and the contradictions of the Pentateuch will still demand an explanation. -- Robert Ingersoll, Some Mistakes of Moses

Genesis

The Genesis 1 creation account conflicts with the order of events that are known to science. In Genesis, the earth is created before light and stars, birds and whales before reptiles and insects, and flowering plants before any animals. The true order of events was just the opposite. 1:1-2:3

God creates light and separates light from darkness, and day from night, on the first day. Yet he didn't make the light producing objects (the sun and the stars) until the fourth day (1:14-19). And how could there be "the evening and the morning" on the first day if there was no sun to mark them? 1:3-5

God spends one-sixth of his entire creative effort (the second day) working on a solid firmament. This strange structure, which God calls heaven, is intended to separate the higher waters from the lower waters. 1:6-8

Plants are made on the third day before there was a sun to drive their photosynthetic processes (1:14-19). 1:11

God lets "the earth bring forth" the plants, rather than creating them directly. Maybe Genesis is not so anti-evolution after all. 1:11

In an apparent endorsement of astrology, God places the sun, moon, and stars in the firmament so that they can be used "for signs". This, of course, is exactly what astrologers do: read "the signs" in the Zodiac in an effort to predict what will happen on Earth. 1:14

God makes two lights: "the greater light [the sun] to rule the day, and the lesser light [the moon] to rule the night." But the moon is not a light, but only reflects light from the sun. And why, if God made the moon to "rule the night", does it spend half of its time moving through the daytime sky? 1:16

"He made the stars also." God spends a day making light (before making the stars) and separating light from darkness; then, at the end of a hard day's work, and almost as an afterthought, he makes the trillions of stars. 1:16

"And God set them [the stars] in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth." 1:17

In verse 11, God "let the earth bring forth" the plants. Now he has the earth "bring forth" the animals as well. So maybe the creationists have it all wrong. Maybe God created livings things through the process of evolution. 1:24

God gave humans dominion over every other living thing on earth. 1:26

God commands us to "be fruitful and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over ... every living thing that moveth upon the earth." 1:28

"I have given you every herb ... and every tree ... for meat." 1:29

All animals were originally herbivores. Tapeworms, vampire bats, mosquitoes, and barracudas -- all were strict vegetarians, as they were created by God. 1:30

"God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good." He purposefully designed a system that ensures the suffering and death of all his creatures, parasite and host, predator and prey. 1:31

In Genesis 1 the entire creation takes 6 days, but the universe is at least 12 billion years old, with new stars constantly being formed. 1:31

Humans were not created instantaneously from dust and breath, but evolved over millions of years from simpler life forms. 2:7

After making the animals, God has Adam name them all. The naming of several million species must have kept Adam busy for a while. 2:18-22

God fashions a woman out of one of Adam's ribs.
Because of this story, it was commonly believed (and sometimes it is still said today) that males have one less rib than females. When Vesalius showed in 1543 that the number of ribs was the same in males and females, it created a storm of controversy. 2:19

God curses the serpent. From now on the serpent will crawl on his belly and eat dust. One wonders how he got around before -- by hopping on his tail, perhaps? But snakes don't eat dust, do they? 3:14

Because Adam listened to Eve, God cursed the ground and causes thorns and thistles to grow. Before this, according to the (false) Genesis story, plants had no natural defenses. The rose had no thorn, cacti were spineless, holly leaves were smooth, and the nettle had no sting. Foxgloves, oleander, and milkweeds were all perfectly safe to eat. 3:17-18

"There were giants in the earth in those days." Well, I suppose it's good to know that. But why is there no archaeological evidence for the existence of these giants? 6:4

Noah is told to make an ark that is 450 feet long. 6:14-15

Whether by twos or by sevens, Noah takes male and female representatives from each species of "every thing that creepeth upon the earth." 7:8

God opens the "windows of heaven." He does this every time it rains. 7:11

All of the animals boarded the ark "in the selfsame day." 7:13-14

The flood covered the highest mountain tops (Mount Everest?) with fifteen cubits to spare. 7:20

"The windows of heaven were stopped, and the rain from heaven was restrained." This happens whenever it stops raining. 8:2

Noah sends a dove out to see if there was any dry land. But the dove returns without finding any. Then, just seven days later, the dove goes out again and returns with an olive leaf. But how could an olive tree survive the flood? And if any seeds happened to survive, they certainly wouldn't germinate and grow leaves within a seven day period. 8:8-11

When the animals left the ark, what would they have eaten? There would have been no plants after the ground had been submerged for nearly a year. What would the carnivores have eaten? Whatever prey they ate would have gone extinct. And how did the New World primates or the Australian marsupials find their way back after the flood subsided? 8:19

Noah kills the "clean beasts" and burns their dead bodies for God. According to 7:8 this would have caused the extinction of all "clean" animals since only two of each were taken onto the ark. 8:20-21

"Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth." Although this would have been good advice for the mythical Noah, it is deadly advice for humankind as a whole. Overpopulation is one of our greatest problems, yet there is nothing in the bible to address it. 9:1

According to this verse, all animals fear humans. Although it is true that many do, it is also true that some do not. Sharks and grizzly bears, for example, are generally much less afraid of us than we are of them. 9:2

"Into your hand are they (the animals) delivered." God gave the animals to humans, and they can do whatever they please with them. This verse has been used by bible believers to justify all kinds of cruelty to animals and environmental destruction. 9:2

God is rightly filled with remorse for having killed his creatures. He even puts the rainbow in the sky to remind himself of his promise to the animals not to do it again. But rainbows are caused by the nature of light, the refractive index of water, and the shape of raindrops. There were rainbows billions of years before humans existed. 9:13

Some creationists believe that this verse refers to continental drift, which, they say, began to occur during the days of Pelag (which means "division"), about 100 or so years after the flood. But many other creationists disagree. 10:25

"The whole earth was of one language." But this could not be true, since by this time (around 2400 BCE) there were already many languages, each unintelligible to the others. 11:1, 6

God worries that people could build a tower high enough to reach him (them?) in heaven, and that by so doing they will become omnipotent. 11:4-6

According to the Tower of Babel story, the many human languages were created instantaneously by God. But actually the various languages evolved gradually over long periods of time. 11:9

The ridiculously long lives of the patriarchs. 11:10-32

"And they returned to the land of the Philistines." But the Philistines didn't arrive in the region of Canaan until around 1200 BCE -- 800 years after Abraham's supposed migration from Ur. 21:32, 26:1, 8, 15, 18

Laban learns "by experience" that God has blessed him for Jacob's sake. "By experience" means "by divination", at least that is how most other versions translate this verse. 30:27

Jacob displays his (and God's) knowledge of biology by having goats copulate while looking at streaked rods. The result is streaked baby goats. 30:37-39

God (or an angel) praises Jacob for his fancy genetic work in Gen.30:37-39. 31:11-12

Joseph and his magic divining cup. 44:5, 44:15
Exodus

It took the Israelites 40 years to travel from Egypt to Canaan, yet such a journey, even at that time, would have taken no more than ten days. 16:35

The Israelite population went from 70 (or 75) to several million in a few hundred years. 1:5,7, 12:37, 38:26

Why are some people born with disabilities? Because God deliberately makes them that way. 4:11

God led the Israelites through the land of the Philistines, hundreds of years before the Philistines were established in Canaan. 13:17

"The manna referred to in the Bible, in Exodus 16:14, seems to have been the dried excrement of Trabutina mannipara, a scale insect that feeds on tamarisk trees." Benjamin B. Normark, The Sex Lives of Scales, Natural History, Sept. 2004. 16:14-15

"In six days the LORD made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that in them."
Believers often say that the "days" of creation should be taken allegorically, but this verse is quite clear. God created the universe in six 24 hour days. 20:11
Leviticus

The bible says that hares and coneys are unclean because they "chew the cud" but do not part the hoof. But hares and coneys are not ruminants and they do not "chew the cud." 11:5-6

Bats are birds to the biblical God. 11:13, 19

Be sure to watch out for those "other flying creeping things which have four feet." (I wish God wouldn't get so technical!) I guess he must mean four-legged insects. You'd think that since God made the insects, and so many of them (at least several million species), that he would know how many legs they have! 11:23

God's law for lepers: Get two birds. Kill one. Dip the live bird in the blood of the dead one. Sprinkle the blood on the leper seven times, and then let the blood-soaked bird fly off. Next find a lamb and kill it. Wipe some of its blood on the patient's right ear, thumb, and big toe. Sprinkle seven times with oil and wipe some of the oil on his right ear, thumb and big toe. Repeat. Finally kill a couple doves and offer one for a sin offering and the other for a burnt offering. 14:2-52
Numbers

The Israelite population went from seventy (Ex.1:5) to several million (over 600,000 adult males) in just a few generations! 1:45-46

God sends quails to feed his people until they were "two cubits [about a meter] high upon the face of the earth." Taking the "face of the earth" to be a circle with a radius of say 30 kilometers (an approximate day's journey), this would amount to 3 trillion (3x1012) liters of quails. At 2 quails per liter, this would provide a couple million quails for each of several million people. 11:31

God strikes Miriam with leprosy. (In the Bible, leprosy is caused by the wrath of God or the malice of Satan.) 12:10

"And there we saw the giants ... And we were in our own sight as grasshoppers, and so we were in their sight." This statement may have been figurative, hyperbole, typical biblical exaggeration, or an actual description of the sons of Anak, in which case they must have been about 100 meters tall. These are the same giants (the Nephilium) that resulted when the "sons of God" mated with "the daughters of men in Gen.6:4. Of course these superhuman god-men should have been destroyed in the flood. So what are they doing still alive? 13:33

It took the Israelites 40 years to travel from Egypt to Canaan, yet such a journey, even at that time, would have taken no more than ten days. 14:33, 32:13

God's cure for snakebite: a brass serpent on a pole. 21:8

God has "the strength of a unicorn." Oh heck, I bet he's even stronger than a unicorn. 23:22, 24:8
Deuteronomy

It took the Israelites 40 years to travel from Egypt to Canaan, yet such a journey, even at that time, would have taken no more than ten days. 2:7, 8:2, 29:5

"A land of giants: giants dwelt therein in old time." (They must have been much more common back then.) 2:10-11, 20-21

Og, the king of the giants, was a tall man, even by NBA standards. His bed measured 9 by 4 cubits (13.5 feet long and 6 feet wide). 3:11

God promises to cast out seven nations including the Amorites, Canaanites, and the Jebusites. But he was unable to fulfill his promise. These nations were "greater and mightier" than the Israelites, who according to Ex.12:37 and Num.1:45-46 already had numbered several million. So the region, according to the bible, must have had a population of more than twenty million! 7:1

This verse mistakenly says that the hare chews its cud. 14:7-8

To the biblical God, a bat is just an another unclean bird. 14:11, 18

"Their wine is the poison of dragons." I wonder what genus and species the bible is referring to when it mentions dragons. 32:33

Joseph's "horns are like the horns of a unicorn." 33:17
Joshua

It took the Israelites 40 years to travel from Egypt to Canaan, yet such a journey, even at that time, would have taken no more than ten days. 5:6

In Joshua 8 the Israelites destroy Ai and make it a desolate heap. But Ai was an abandoned city by the time of the Israelites and this story is a myth invented to explain the ruins of an ancient city that the Israelites encountered. See Archaeology and Biblical Accuracy by Farrell Till. 8:1-29

This verse says that Ai was never again occupied after it was destroyed by Joshua. But Nehemiah (7:32) lists it among the cities of Israel at the time of the Babylonian captivity. 8:28

In a divine type of daylight savings time, God makes the sun stand still so that Joshua can get all his killing done before dark. 10:12-13

"And the coast of Og king of Bashan, which as of the remnant of the giants...." 12:4, 18:6
Judges

"The stars in their courses fought against Sisera." Unless astrology is true, how can the stars affect the outcome of a battle? 5:20

"As the sun ... goeth forth in his might." The sun, according to the bible, goes around the earth. 5:31
1 Samuel

"The pillars of the earth are the LORD's, and he hath set the world upon them. 2:8

Goliath was ten feet tall ("six cubits and a span"). 17:4
2 Samuel

In what is surely a biblical exaggeration, we are told that "the servants of David" killed 20,000 soldiers in one day. And that "the wood [forest] devoured more people that day than the sword devoured." It must have been spooky forest to have devoured more than 20,000 soldiers. There were probably lots of lions and tigers and bears. (Oh my!)18:7-8

The earth shakes, the foundations of heaven move, smoke comes out of God's nostrils, and fire out of his mouth. 22:8-16

How many soldiers did Israel have? This verse says that Judah and Israel had a total of 1,300,000 fighting men (1 Chr.21:5 says 1,570,000) in this battle. Of course, this is a ridiculously high number for a battle between two tribal armies in 1000 BCE. (The United States had about 1.37 million active duty soldiers in 2001.) 24:9
1 Kings

This verse implies that the value of p is 3. (The actual value is approximately 3.14159.) 7:23

God creates droughts by causing "heaven to shut up" as a punishment for sin. 8:35

Ever the playful spirit, God withers, and then restores, the hand of king Jeroboam. 13:4
2 Kings

Elisha cures a leper, but only after the leper dips himself seven times in the Jordan. 5:14

Elisha not only can cure leprosy, he can also dish it out. Here he makes his servant (Gehazi) and all his descendants lepers forever. 5:27

A dead body is brought to life when it accidentally touches the bones of Elisha. 13:21

Isaiah, with a little help from God, makes the sun move backwards ten degrees. Now that's quite a trick. All at once, the earth stopped spinning and then reversed its direction of rotation. Or maybe the sun traveled around the earth in those days! 20:11
1 Chronicles

Some creationists believe that this verse (and Gen.10:25) refers to continental drift, which, they say, began to occur during the days of Pelag (which means "division"), about 100 or so years after the flood. 1:19

"The earth ... shall be stable, that it be not moved." It doesn't spin on its axis or travel about the sun. 16:30

According to this verse David's army had 1,100,000 men from Israel and 470,000 men from Judah, Of course, this numbers is ridiculously high for a battle between two tribal armies in 1000 BCE. (The United States had about 1.37 million active duty soldiers in 2001.) 21:5 David provides Solomon with a fantastically large amount of gold and silver with which to build the temple: 100,000 talents of gold and 1,000,000 talents of silver. Since a talent was about 60 pounds, this would be about 3,000 tons of gold and 30,000 tons of silver. 22:14

King David collects ten thousand drams (or darics) for the construction of the temple in Jerusalem. This is especially interesting since darics were coins named after King Darius I who lived some five hundred years after David. 29:7

As usual, the reported amounts of gold, silver, and iron are grossly exaggerated. (100,000 talents of iron, for example, would be about 34 million kilograms.) 29:7
2 Chronicles

Since the molten sea was round with a diameter of ten cubits and a circumference of thirty cubits, we know that the biblical value of p is 3. (The actual value is approximately 3.14159.) 4:2

Abijah spoke to 1,200,000 soldiers at one time. (He had a really loud voice.) 13:3-4

500,000 soldiers die in a single God-assisted slaughter. 13:16-17

In the largest single God-assisted massacre in the bible, Asa, with God's help, kills one million Ethiopians. 14:8-14

Asa, when he had a foot disease, went to physicians instead of seeking the Lord. (God disapproves of those who seek medical help rather than "seeking the Lord.") 16:12

God makes Uzziah a leper for burning incense without a license. 26:19-21
Esther

"Haman thought in his heart." Most people think with their heads, but biblical folks think with their hearts. 6:6
Job

The earth rests upon pillars and doesn't move (unless God gets angry or something). 9:6

"Which commandeth the sun, and it riseth not."
The earth is fixed and the sun travels about it. 9:7

Heaven is set upon pillars that tremble when God gets mad. 26:11

The earth is set on foundations and it does not move. 38:4-6

God has snow and hail all stored up to use later "in time of trouble." 38:22

God spread out the sky, which is a solid structure, hard and strong like a mirror. 37:18

Ostriches are not cruel and stupid birds who abandon their eggs to die after laying them, as these verses imply. They are, in fact, careful and attentive parents. The male scoops out a hollow for the eggs, which are incubated by the female during the day and the male at night. After the eggs are hatched, they are cared for by the mother for over a month, at which time the chicks can keep up with running adults. 39:13-16

The bible is wrong about ostriches being cruel and inattentive parents (39:13-16). But if they were, whose fault would it be? Why would God deprive them of the tools that are needed to do the job right? 39:17

Bible believers have identified the behemoth as a hippopotamus, dinosaur, wildebeest, or crocodile. But my favorite is the way these verses are translated by Stephen Mitchell: "Look now: the Beast that I made: he eats grass like a bull. Look: the power in his thighs, the pulsing sinews of his belly. His penis stiffens like a pine; his testicles bulge with vigor." 40:15-16

"Canst thou draw out leviathan with an hook? or his tongue with a cord?" 41:1-34
Psalms

The earth shakes whenever God really gets mad. 18:7

"The foundations of the world were discovered ... at the blast of the breath of thy nostrils." (The earth is set on firm foundations and does not move -- unless God blows his nose.) 18:15

"The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament sheweth his handywork." 19:1

The sun moves around the earth. 19:4-6

From his seat in heaven, God can see the whole earth and all its inhabitants.
(He sits directly above the earth, which is a flat disc below him.) 33:14-15

Diseases are sent by God to punish sin. 38:3

According to the psalmist, snails melt. But they don't, of course, they simply leave a slimy trail as they move along. 58:8

God is so strong that he can break the head of dragons and of leviathan. 74:13-14

God holds the earth up with pillars. 75:3

Another reference to "the foundations of the earth", implying that the earth is fixed and does not move. 82:5

"Thou hast broken Rahab [the sea monster] in pieces." 89:10

"The world also is established, that it cannot be moved." 93:1

"The world also shall be established that it shall not be moved." 96:10

"The Lord ... who healeth all thy diseases." God heals all diseases. Medical science is unnecessary. 103:2-3

"God ... who stretchest out the heavens like a curtain" (The earth is stationary and does not orbit the sun.) 104:5

"In wisdom hast thou made them all." 104:24

God is offended by those who make things with their hands or invent things with their minds. 106:39

"The LORD is good to all: and his tender mercies are over all his works." Then why do nearly all animals die painful deaths from starvation, predation, or disease long before they reach adulthood? 145:9

God "satisfiest the desire of every living thing." But in nature few needs are met and few desires are satisfied. Life is short, hard, cruel, and painful for nearly every living thing. 145:17

"He calleth them all by their names."
God knows how many stars there are and knows them all by name. That's pretty impressive since there are 100 billion or so gallaxies, each containing about 100 billion stars. 147:7

"Praise him in the firmament of his power." 150:1
Ecclesiastes

"The sun also ariseth"
Although this verse is interpreted figuratively today, it was taken literally by virtually all Christians until the Copernican revolution, and was used by the Church to condemn Galileo for teaching the heliocentric heresy. 1:5

"He hath made every thing beautiful."
Everything is beautiful in its own way. Parasitic worms, cancer cells, bubonic plague. You just have to look at it from God's eyes. 3:11

"No man can find out the work that God maketh."
Science is impossible. We can learn nothing at all about the natural world. 3:11
Isaiah

"The wolf also shall dwell with the lamb...." I wonder what will become of the spiders. Will they be more friendly toward flies? And will the parasitic wasps find another way to feed their larvae? Or will they continue to feed off the living bodies of caterpillars? 11:6, 65:25

"And the weaned child shall put his hand on the cockatrice' den." A cockatrice is a serpent, hatched from a cock's egg, that can kill with a glance. They are rare nowadays. 11:8

God will gather up the people of Judea "from the four corners of the earth." In the Bible's view, the earth is flat with four corners. 11:12

According to the Bible, the moon produces its own light and the earth does not move. 13:10

When God gets really angry, he causes earthquakes. 13:13

Dragons will live in Babylonian palaces and satyrs will dance there. 13:21-22

Out of the serpent's root shall come forth a cockatrice, and his fruit shall be a fiery flying serpent." What ever happened to these fascinating biblical creatures? 14:29

God will turn the earth upside down, knock it off of its foundations, and then shake and bake it until it "reels to and fro like a drunkard." 24:1, 18-20

God will punish the leviathan ("that crooked serpent") with his own sword and will kill the sea dragon. 27:1

Natural disasters (earthquakes, storms, fires, tsunamis) are caused by, and are a sign of, God's wrath. 29:7

Among the many strange creatures mentioned in the Bible that no longer seem to exist is the "fiery flying serpent." 30:6

"The light of the moon shall be as the light of the sun, and the light of the sun shall be sevenfold." Well, this is one prophecy that will never come true. Since the moon has no light of its own, but only reflects that of the sun, it could never shine like the sun. And the sun will not, at least not while there are humans to see it, shine 7 times as bright as it does now. 30:26

"And the unicorns shall come down with them." 34:7

Dragons and satyrs may not seem real to you, but they did to the author of these verses. 34:13-14

God makes the sun move backwards 10 degrees. Now that's a neat trick! 38:8

The earth is a flat disc that God looks down upon from his throne in heaven. 40:22

Even the dragons honor God. 43:20

God cut Rahab (the sea monster) to pieces, wounded the dragon, and dried up the sea. 51:9-10

Bad people hatch poisonous cockatrice eggs. Whoever eats the eggs will die, and when the eggs are crushed a viper hatches out of them. 59:5

"Neither for brightness shall the moon give light unto thee." Of course the moon doesn't give off light, but only reflects the light from the sun. 60:19
Jeremiah

Droughts are punishments from God. 3:3

"I will send serpents, cockatrices among you, which will not be charmed, and they shall bite you." A cockatrice is a serpent, hatched from a cock's egg, that can kill with a glance. They are rare nowadays. 8:17

When God gets angry, the earth trembles. (That's what causes earthquakes.) 10:10

The wild asses "snuffed up the wind like dragons." 14:6

The earth is set on foundations and does not move. 31:37
Lamentations

Ostriches are not cruel and inattentive parents, as this verse implies. They are, in fact, careful and attentive parents. The male scoops out a hollow for the eggs, which are incubated by the female during the day and the male at night. After the eggs are hatched, they are cared for by the mother for over a month, at which time the chicks can keep up with running adults. 4:3
Ezekiel

"The firmament ... the terrible crystal, stretched forth over their heads above." 1:22

The world is flat and has four corners. 7:2

The firmament is over the heads of the cherubim. 10:1

God "will cover the sun with a cloud, and the moon shall not give her light." To Ezekiel, the sun is just a little light that can be covered with a cloud, and the moon produces its own light. 32:7
Daniel

The third year of the reign of Jehoiakim would be 606 BCE, at which time Nebuchadnezzar was not yet king of Babylon. It was 597 BCE that Nebuchadnezzar invaded Jerusalem for the first time (without actually destroying it). By that time Jehohiakim was dead and his son, Jehoiachin, was ruling. 1:1

The stone became "a great mountain" that "filled the whole earth." This could only be possible on a flat, disc-shaped earth. 2:35

Daniel's tree is tall enough to be seen from "the end of all the earth." Only on a flat earth would this be possible. 4:10-11, 20

Apparently, the author of Daniel knew of only two Babylonian kings during the period of the exile: Nebuchadnezzar and Belshazzar, who he wrongly thought was the son of Nebuchadnezzar. But Nebuchadnezzar died in 562 BCE and was succeeded by his son, Awil-Marduk (referred to in the bible as "Evilmerodach" [see 2 Kg.25:27 and Jer.52:31]). In 560 BCE, Amel-Marduk was assassinated by his brother-in-law, Nergal-shar-usur. The next and last king of Babylon was Nabonidus who reigned from 556 to 539, when Babylon was conquered by Cyrus. It was Nabonidus, and not Belshazzar, who was the last of the Babylonian kings. Belshazzar was a the son and viceroy of Nabonidus. But he was not a king, and was not the son (or any other relation) of Nebuchadnezzar. 5:2,11,18,22

Darius the Median is a fictitious character whom the author perhaps confused with Darius I of Persia, who came to the throne in 521 BCE, 17 years after the fall of Babylon. The author of Daniel incorrectly makes him the successor of Belshazzar instead of Cyrus. 5:31

To Daniel, the stars are small objects that can fall from the sky and then be "stamped upon." 8:10

"They ... shall shine as the brightness of the firmament." 12:3
Joel

"The sun shall be turned into darkness, and the moon into blood." These "signs" were a lot more impressive before the causes of solar and lunar eclipses were understood. 2:31
Amos

God destroyed the Amorites who were a race of giants as tall as cedars and as strong as oaks. 2:9

It took the Israelites 40 years to travel from Egypt to Canaan, yet such a journey, even at that time, would have taken no more than ten days. 2:10
Jonah

God makes "a great fish" to swallow Jonah. And Jonah stayed in the fish's belly for three days and three nights. 1:17

"Now Nineveh was an exceeding great city of three days' journey." That would make it about 60 miles in diameter -- larger than Los Angeles! 3:3
Micah

The earth is set upon strong foundations and therefore does not move. 6:2
Nahum

Tornadoes, earthquakes, and fires are caused by God and are signs of his anger. 1:5
Habakkuk

"The sun and moon stood still in their habitation." This verse apparently refers to Joshua 10:12-13, where God makes the sun stand still. 3:11
Matthew

When was Jesus born? 2:1

"The star ... went before them."
If the star "went before them," leading them to Bethlehem, then it couldn't have been a star or any other astronomical object or event. But Matthew couldn't have known that. Everyone at the time thought that stars were just little points of light a short distance above the earth. It'd be no problem to have one hover above a particular place for a while. 2:9

Herod kills all boys in and around Bethlehem that are two years old and under. Such a massacre would certainly have been noted by contemporary historians. Yet not even Josephus, who documented Herod's life in detail, mentioned this event. 2:16

The devil kidnaps Jesus and takes him up to the top of the temple, and then to the top of "an exceedingly high mountain," high enough to see "all the kingdoms of the world." I guess the earth was flat in those days. 4:8

"Behold the fowls of the air...." Jesus says that God feeds them. But, if so, he does one hell of a lousy job at it. Most birds die before leaving the nest, and the few who manage to fly soon die painful deaths of starvation, predation, or disease. If God is caring for them, pray that he stays away from you. 6:26

Speaking of the birds, Jesus asks: "Are ye not much better than they?" This is meant as a rhetorical question, but the answer is far from obvious to me. I guess to Jesus, though, birds are not worth much compared to humans. So you can do whatever the hell you want with (and to) them. 6:26

According to Matthew, people who cannot speak are possessed by the devil. 9:32-33

Jesus gives his disciples "power against unclean spirits, to cast them out, and to heal all manner of sickness." 10:1

Jesus tells his disciples to perform all the usual tricks: "heal the sick, cleanse the lepers, raise the dead, and cast out devils." 10:8

God is involved in the death of every sparrow. He sees to it that they each die painful deaths of starvation, predation, or disease. But don't worry. God will do the same for you. (He thinks that humans are worth much more than sparrows.) 10:29. 31

Jesus casts out a devil from a man who was blind and dumb. (Thos we are unable to see or hear are possessed by devils.) 12:22

Some Christians believe that the natural evil in the world (predators, parasites, pain, death) is due to Satan, not God. 13:28

Jesus is incorrect when he says that the mustard seed is the smallest seed. And since there are no trees in the mustard family, mustard seeds do not grow into "the greatest of all trees." 13:31-32

Jesus cures an epileptic "lunatic" by "rebuking the devil." (Epilepsy is caused by devils.) 17:15-18

"The moon shall not give her light, and the stars shall fall from heaven." Apparently, Jesus believed that the moon produces its own light, and that the stars are lights held in place by a firmament only a few miles above our heads. 24:29

Jesus believed that Noah's flood actually happened. 24:37

When Jesus was crucified, there was three hours of complete darkness "over all the land." And when he died, there was a great earthquake with many corpses walking the streets of Jerusalem. It is strange that there is no record of any of these extraordinary events outside of the gospels. 27:45, 51-53
Mark

Jesus is incorrect when he says that the mustard seed is the smallest seed. (The smallest seeds are found among the tropical, epiphytic orchids.) 4:31

"Thy faith hath made thee whole." If you have enough faith, you will never get sick. (Illness is caused by sin and lack of faith. Medical science is unnecessary.) 5:34

Jesus heals a boy with "a dumb spirit" by saying, "Thou dumb and deaf spirit, I charge thee, come out of him and enter no more into him." (Sounds like a script from Monty Python, doesn't it?) But how could a deaf spirit hear the words spoken to it? And how could a dumb spirit cry out? 9:17, 25-26

"But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female."
Jesus believed that sex and Adam and Eve were created "from the beginning." But the universe is about 13.6 billion years old, the earth 4.6 billion, sex a billion years or so, and humans (depending on how you define "human") for a couple million years. 10:6

"In those days ... the moon shall not give her light, and the stars of heaven shall fall." Of course this is nonsense. The billions of stars will never fall to earth and the moon does not produce its own light. 13:24-25

When Jesus was crucified, there was three hours of complete darkness "over the whole land." It is strange that there is no record of this extraordinary event outside of the gospels. 15:33
Luke

When was Jesus born? 2:1

The devil takes Jesus to the top of a mountain and shows him "all the kingdoms of the world." I guess the world was flat in those days. 4:5

Epilepsy is caused by devils. 9:39

People who cannot speak are possessed with devils. 11:14

Illnesses are caused by Satan. 13:11-16

Jesus believed the story of Noah's ark. 17:26-27

Jesus also believes the story about Sodom's destruction. He says, "even thus shall it be in the day the son of man is revealed." This tells us about Jesus' knowledge of science and history. 17:29-32

"And there shall be signs in the sun, and in the moon, and in the stars." 21:25

When Jesus was crucified, there was three hours of complete darkness "over all the earth." It is strange that there is no record of this extraordinary event outside of the gospels. 23:44-45
John

"These things were done in Bethabara beyond Jordan, where John was baptizing." But no such site is known in history. Some translations (ASV, NAB, NIV, RSV, NRSV) rename Bethabara as Bethany, but Bethany is a suburb of Jerusalem and, therefore, not "beyond the Jordan." 1:28

"If I have told you earthly things, and ye believe not, how shall ye believe, if I tell you of heavenly things?"
Good question, Jesus! He was wrong about creation in Mk.10:6, wrong about the flood in Lk.17:26-27, and wrong about the smallest seed in Mt.13:31-32. So why would anyone believe him when he talks about heaven in Jn.3:16? 3:12

Whoever enters a pool after it is stirred up by angels will be cured of "whatsoever disease he had." 5:4

Jesus believes people are crippled by God as a punishment for sin. He tells a crippled man, after healing him, to "sin no more, lest a worse thing come unto thee." 5:14

The disciples ask Jesus about the cause of a man's blindness. Was it because he or his parents sinned? Jesus said neither had sinned. The man was born blind so that Jesus could show off his powers by curing him of his blindness. 9:1-3

A blind man's sight is restored by washing in the pool of Siloam. 9:7
Acts

"Ye men of Galilee, why stand ye gazing up into heaven?"
This verse was used by a Dominican friar to discourage the use of Galileo's telescope. (Notice the pun on Galileo's name in "men of Galilee".) 1:11

The prophets have spoken "since the world began," which means that humans have been around since the creation of the world. But humans are recent arrivals on an ancient earth. There were no prophets when the earth formed 4.6 billion years ago. 3:21

The sick were healed just by touching the shadow of Peter. 5:15-16

It took the Israelites 40 years to travel from Egypt to Canaan, yet such a journey, even at that time, would have taken no more than ten days. 7:36, 13:18

Sick people are oppressed by the devil. 10:38

Sick people were cured by touching the handkerchief or apron of Paul. And the evil spirits when out of them." 19:12

Paul is bitten by a poisonous snake and yet lives. The "barbarians" who were shipwrecked with him thought he must be a murderer since he was bitten; but then they changed their minds and thought him to be a god since he didn't die. (The snake story is especially interesting since there are no poisonous snakes on Malta, and there is no evidence of their existence in the past.) 28:3-8
Romans

The existence and nature of God are self-evident. 1:20

The Religious Right often uses Romans 1:21-25 to condemn environmentalists. 1:21-25

Paul claims that before Adam sinned death did not exist. But, of course, death didn't enter the world a few thousand years ago because of Adam's sin. Death has been a part of life since life first arose (on this planet, at least) a few billion years ago. 5:12

Paul says that everyone, even in his day, had the gospel preached to them. Even the Native Americans, Asians, Pacific Islanders? 10:18
1 Corinthians

Paul shows his ignorance (and God's) of biology by saying that only dead seeds will germinate. Actually, a seed must be alive to germinate. 15:36

"All flesh is not the same flesh: but there is one kind of flesh of men, another of beasts."
This verse is used by Creationists to argue against both evolution and any attempt to create "human-animal hybrids" or "chimeras." 15:39

"The first man Adam"
Young Earth Creationists use this verse to support a literal reading of Genesis. "If we cannot believe in the First Adam, why believe in the Last [Christ]?" 15:45

"And afterward that which is spiritual."
Asa Gray, the foremost American botanist in the 19th century and close friend of Charles Darwin, used this verse to support the idea that the Bible is not inconsistent with human evolution. 15:46
2 Corinthians
"As the serpent beguiled Eve"
Young Earth Creationists use this verse to show that Paul believed the creation story in Gen.3:1-6. 11:3
Ephesians

Satan is the "prince of the power of the air." Until modern times Christians believed that Satan was responsible for storms and droughts. 2:2
Colossians

"For by him were all things created.... All things were created by him, and for him.... And by him all things consist." Including guinea worms? 1:16-17
1 Timothy

"For Adam was first formed, then Eve." Young Earth Creationists use this verse to show that Paul believed the creation story in Gen.2:18-22. 2:13

Avoid science, especially that which disagrees with Paul ("science falsely so called"). Other versions translate this phrase as "false knowledge", which may be more correct. However many fundamentalist Christians still use this verse ("science falsely so called") to justify their rejection of any idea, scientific or otherwise, they believe contradicts the bible. 6:20
Hebrews

God set the earth on a foundation; therefore, it does not move. 1:10
James

James says that, even in his day, all beasts, birds, serpents, and sea creatures had been tamed by humans. 3:7

If you are sick, rely on the power of prayer. It works every time. 5:14-15

By praying, Elias was able to keep it from raining for three and a half years. 5:17
2 Peter

Those who disbelieve in the Bible's creation and flood stories are "willingly ignorant." 3:5

"God ... spared not the old world, but saved Noah."
Young Earth Creationists use this verse to show that the New Testament authors believed in the flood story. (So you should too.) 2:4-5
Revelation

"Behold, he cometh with clouds; and every eye shall see him." This could only happen on a flat earth. 1:7

Jesus holds seven stars in his hand. Of course, it is possible that this is metaphorical. Perhaps. But it is clear from other verses (6:13, 8:10, 12:4) that John thought of stars as being small, perhaps even small enough for Jesus to hold in his hand. 1:16

"Thou hast created all things, and for thy pleasure they are and were created." God created predators, pathogens, and predators for his very own pleasure. One of his favorite species is guinea worms. 4:11

The sixth seal is opened and there is a great earthquake, the sun becomes black, and the moon red, the stars fall from heaven, and mountains and islands move around. 6:12-14

"And the stars of heaven fell unto the earth...." To John, the stars are just little lights a few miles away that can easily fall to the earth. 6:13

John "saw four angels standing on the four corners of the earth." Well, I guess that settles it: the earth is flat and square-shaped, or at least quadrilateral in shape. 7:1

An angel threw the censer down to earth, causing thunder, lightning, and earthquakes. 8:5

"And there fell a great star from heaven, burning as it were a lamp, and it fell upon the third part of the rivers, and upon the fountains of waters." In the bible, stars are just little lights that can fall to the ground from the sky. 8:10

The fourth trumpet smites one third of the sun, moon, and stars. 8:12

"I saw a star fall from heaven unto the earth." 9:1

God's witnesses have special powers. They can shut up heaven so that it cannot rain, turn rivers into blood, and smite the earth with plagues "as often as they will." 11:6

The dragon's tail smacks down to earth one third of the stars. To the author of Revelation, the stars are just little lights that can fall to the ground from the sky. 12:4

i am my own god

Demand Justice for Karley the puppy?

Nov 23, 2008 by natagurl | Posted in Dogs

Johnson remains un-arrested, in his Riverside County home on paid administrative leave while the brutal beating of his neighbor's 6-month-old puppy, Karley - which resulted in a crushed skull, dislocated eye, broken jaw, and broken nose - is being investigated.

The puppy had to be euthanized because of the degree of her suffering and the fact that she sustained permanent brain damage.






Johnson admitted to the horrific crime which occurred on Monday, November 3, 2008 but is claiming he acted in self-defense. He placed his hands inside Karley's mouth to break her jaw and nose, in addition to crushing her skull via repeated blows to the head with an 11-inch rock. The puppy was so severely injured that she had to be put down just hours after the brutal attack.

Listed below are the addresses and telephone numbers of the Los Angeles County Fire Department Headquarters, Riverside County District Attorney's Office, and Riverside County Sheriff's Office. Please call or write to these officials to demand accountability and justice for this felony to the fullest extent allowed by law.

Talking Points:

1. Karley deserves justice for her suffering and death.

2. Karley's family deserves recognition for their emotional pain and loss.

3. The perpetrator needs to pay for his crime.

4. Animal abuse should not be tolerated in a civilized society - especially by persons in high-ranking positions of public trust - and especially by those who may be called upon to help animals at their job.

5. The FBI and behavioral scientists recognize (and have documented) that animal abuse, especially when it goes unpunished, often leads to (or occurs at the same time as) violence against people.

Los Angeles County Fire Department Headquarters

Chief P. Michael Freeman

1320 N. Eastern Ave.

Los Angeles, CA 90063

(323) 881-2401



Riverside County District Attorney's Office

4075 Main Street

Riverside, CA 92501

(951) 955-5400



Riverside County Sheriff's Office

Perris Station

137 N. Perris

Perris, CA 92570

(951) 210-1000

tyvm for this information

Should I stay or Go? Husband had long term affair.?

Sep 07, 2008 by Mrs. Smith | Posted in Marriage & Divorce

I am a 41 year old married women, my husband and I have one child together who is 8 years old and is a "Severe Brittle Diabetic", he was diagnosed at age 6. A few months prior to our son being diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes I discovered that my husband and our mutual friend had been loveres since the time of our marriage, which is about 6 years. This lady was also his underling at work, they are painters and also are Mexican Nationals. I am American.

This lady was my friend and helped me around the house and also did a lot of childcare for us in our home. I did favors for her and her family such as I leased a nice house for her and her adult son to live in three houses down from our family home because they had been living in a trailer with cockroaches. When I took our son to Disneyworld at age 6 I invited this lady to go with us, and she did. My husband stayed home but "sent" her with me and our little boy on vacation. Of course I did not know she was his lover, If I had known that I would have driven her straight to the Mexican Border and threw her back to her "third world country", she was here illegally as is my husband.

When I discovered the truth about my husband and his Adultery I was devastated. The lady he had been with left the country that very day and I never had the chance to speak to her regarding her relationship with my husband, that of course was for the best as I wanted to kill her for the first month and probably would have physically attacked her If I had located her. I have struggled with horrible depression and tormenting thoughts ever since finding out, I oftentimes feel like my life is over with and that I'm ruined.

About the time I found out our financial situation began a "nose dive" into the proverbial "toilet" and now we are broke. Our cars were taken away, we lost our home. The constuction jobs in Myrtle Beach came to a screeching halt and although my husband works very hard and is dilligent we don't even have our $550 dollar rent money for September. I have not worked since our son was diagnosed because it's been a full-time job keeping him alive and he had a very dangerous time at school becuase he did not have the right kind of help in managing Diabetes and Diabetes related emergencys. Now though the school district has provided him with a full-time Nurse at school and at least when I drop him off he has protection.

I'm extremely hateful at times to my husband because he disgusts me and I have no respect for him at all, although I have tried to give it into the hands of GOD and allow GOD to heal me it seems that my husband has not truly changed in the aspect that he will still tell a "lie" now and then and then justify himself as all liars do. So in addition to all these things I've gained 150 pounds, so now I'm middle aged and fat and broke.

I have a dream to move to Woodville, Texas where my elderly Mother and sister live however they are not in a position to take us in and my Mother said that we could not bring my son's dog and cat. Also I am concerned that I'm being selfish to take my son away from his Dad, I fear that it will break his heart and hurt him beyond my ability to repair.

But I don't know what to do I am so desperate to leave this city and state, I want to go live near the few relatives that we have and I'm not sure If I'm just being a "dreamer" or not. I have no car, no job, no money, my little boy and I would probably have to try and live in a "long term" Womens shelter in the Woodville area and just build a life from nothing. This again would mean that my son would lose his dog and cat who he loves like siblings. I know that my Mother and sister would put us up in their small house but they live 8 miles from the school and without a car I would not be able to take my son to school and pick him up. Not only that but Woodville is a very small town and the jobs are few in number so it will probably be a real "crap-shoot" to get a decent job. I worked as a Pay-day loan manager/Check Casher and have office experience, I'm also bi-lingual and speak spanish.

I fear that the years will just go by and nothing will change here with my husband and I'll wake up an overweight 50 year old with no life. We have no family here in South Carolina and my grown daughter and grandson live in Los Angeles so I feel that Texas is much closer than South Carolina for at least once a year visits. The thing is that I don't know If I have a right to take our son to Texas and leave my husband behind. He told me that he was going to kill me and then kill himself.

When my husband told me that he was going to kill me and then himself I was raging at him over another of his lies and I told him that I would kill him If he "betrayed" me again in any way. So now what? Am I a "domestic abuser"....or is he? It seems to me that Adultery for our entire marriage, financial fraud against me and telling me I am "crazy" for years is some kind of abuse, perhaps mental a

Your Answer:
when people realize that their manipulations of others comes to an end they get really really, extreme. You have been thru hell and back thru your marriage and I am sure you never looked at your husband as the type of man who would do this sort of thing to you. Is it possible that he married you to become a citizen? and had a child for the pretense of love? This is really really sad. You have been manipulated for your entire, marriage.......I don't know what else you need for grounds for leaving him. You are resentful towards him, but if you just eat it, and internalize it you WILL be an overweight 50 year old with no life. What type of life will you two have together? You may or may not meet someone else to love long term but my guess is its a good chance that you will. Overweight or not. Do for self, go for a few walks and take care of yourself, eat right, dont do anything too drastic to lose the weight. I dont think you necessarily have to live in WOODVILLE you can live in tyler like someone suggested. The houses in TYLER ARE RIDICULOUSLY CHEAP you can rebuild yourself in about 2 years. As far as finding a job check craigslist, and if you need to have your items shipped and take your son on the bus by all means get the heck out of there.

Why would you allow yourself to be held hostage by a man who has thought of himself your E-N-T-I-R-E MARRIAGE. And the fact that he sent this b -itch on vacation with you and your son tells me that he shows little regard for you or for him. How did you find out? And r you sure that she was deported? or went back voluntarily to mexico? Your husband has little regard for your mental capacity. If he could do all these things to you and become so enraged and surprised at the thought that you have enough brain cells to conjure up leaving his a s s, he threatens you with killing you and himself? And what of his son that needs medical treatment son? You can get a lengthly restraining order with that. You may or may not want to do that and you probably wont but you have to do what you have to do. If he is going to step all over you the e-n-t-i-r-e marriage and not want you to be happy then try to manipulate you into staying with him, please he is a low, SAAD EXCUSE FOR A MAN.

Do you know how many bilingual people they need in texas?? Good luck
You better call the state department and find out what options they have for you, section 8, low income housing? the first step is to find a domestic abuse shelter and talk to them. They will assist you.

answer minhttp://answers.yahoo.com/question/index; _ylt=Ah3kFtLn78F7BXtSb3To3tDsy6IX;_ylv=3 ?qid=20080908003104AAInwUo

Conflict in the Work Place?

Dec 23, 2009 by MsSterious | Posted in Friends

I'm having a problem at work. I've been working for a well known company in Los Angeles for over 4 and a half years. In August I was oved toa new department because my old department was being closed. Everything started out great in the new department. I got along with everyon, plus I love my new job. But everything started to change about a month later. One of my co-workers started to act differently towards me. We were cool at first. But now she has an attitude with me. For example, one day I told her I had a call holding for her and she kept walking like she didn't hear me. I knew she heard me because she was standing right by my desk. My supervisor even noticed it because he commented on it BUT neglected to tell her anything. Which brings me to another issue at work. Our supervisor gives her way too much freedom. He's the supervisor but he lets her call all the shots even though she's NOT a supevisor. She even tells him what to do. For example, if someone does something she doesn't like she'll tell him to address it & he'll do it. But if someone else has a complaint about her he does nothing about it.

There's been rumors going around that she's been having an affair with him. I'm not sure if it's true, but I've kind of suspected it all along. They're way too close and friendly with each other, even though he's married with children. I don't really care if she doesn't like me, but what bothers me is I'm not sure why she's acting this way towards me. I can admit when I've done or said something wrong, but that's not the case in this situation. I've come to the following conclusions. Maybe it's because:

1) I'm the youngest in the office? I'm 26, she's in her late 40's.
2) I talk to another co-worker in the office that she doesn't like?
3) I get along well with our supervisor.
4) I'm not loud and obnoxious like her.

I've been nothing but nice to her ever since I've been here, even when she treats me like shit. I'm quiet and pretty much stay to myself. I don't gossip or start rumors (unlike her). I'm a people person and get a long with the majority of people I meet. Killing her with kindness doesn't seem to be working. It's time to try a new tactic. But I'm not sure what to do. She has everyone in the office walking on egg sheels. No one stands up to her because she has our supervisor's nose wide open. I want to stand up to her, but at the same time I want to keep my job too, especially during these times. Please help! What would you do in my situation?

P.S.
She confirmed her disike for me today. For Christms she gave me and another co-worker a candy bar, but everyone else in the office got nice gift bags.

It sounds like she is doing your boss. Theres not a lot you can do as she has your boss under her thumb. Well you could send an anonymous letter to the boss's wife but it could backfire

Is Manny Pacquiao hiding something?

Dec 24, 2009 by carytop | Posted in Boxing

David Mayo Columns, Mayweather Stories, Sports - All Regions, Statewide »
Manny Pacquiao only fueling the Mayweathers' fire by refusing random blood tests
By David Mayo | The Grand Rapids Press
December 24, 2009, 3:05PM
The longer this impasse goes, the worse it looks for Manny Pacquiao.

If you’re really the pound-for-pound king, if you’re really not using performance-enhancers, then you do exactly what Floyd Mayweather asks. You get yourself poked with a needle on a handful of occasions -- certainly fewer times than Pacquiao has been poked with a tattoo needle -- then make Mayweather pay for his arrogance on the night of March 13.

If you’re the pound-for-pound king, and you didn’t get that way through sophisticated doping techniques for which you know there are masking methods and/or no urine detection technology, you give up a few drops of blood without any knowledge when you might be asked to do so, a few times between now and the fight, then you do your job.

If you’re the pound-for-pound king, you step up and make yourself heard on this issue, and quit letting your promoter and your trainer bellow that Mayweather’s demand is a method of seeking a way to avoid the fight.

Mayweather, the Grand Rapids native, agreed to every contractual tenet.

He accepted a 50-50 split, even though his pay-per-view fights against common opponents greatly outsold Pacquiao’s.

He agreed to pay Pacquiao a $10 million penalty if he comes in even half-a-biscuit or one swallow of his beloved Mountain Dew heavier than the 147-pound limit. That’s astounding, given that Mike Tyson was fined $3 million for biting a chunk out of Evander Holyfield’s ear.

All he asked for in return was random blood testing.

AP File PhotoThere's been a lot of spin put out there by Manny Pacquiao's promoter Bob Arum. But will they really turn down a possible $40 million payday over random blood drug testing?And Pacquiao wouldn’t comply.

The longer it goes on, the more we start to sneer at the Filipino idol and wonder why.

Bob Arum, Pacquiao’s promoter, has been busy at work spinning public favor in his fighter’s direction. And Freddie Roach, Pacquiao’s trainer, has lambasted Mayweather for a demand that he somehow deems disruptive to training.

Forget that Pacquiao has endured any number of pinpricks for tattoos, including one he got just before his most recent fight, against Miguel Cotto, who declared the Filipino the hardest puncher he ever faced after getting knocked out by him, which certainly arched some eyebrows among the performance-enhancing theorists, considering the 40-pound gap Pacquiao has traversed since turning professional.

Forget that since the fight fell apart Tuesday night because of the drug-testing issue, a number of experts have declared it ridiculous that Pacquiao was willing to undergo blood testing on a set schedule, but not at all within 30 days of the fight, and that the top executive of the U.S. Anti-Doping Association told the Los Angeles Times such a schedule would allow plenty of time to “dope to the gills and get away with it.”

That’s what Pacquiao’s side wants everyone to forget.

Well, here’s a suggestion: Random means random, and if you don’t submit, you only fuel the fire the Mayweathers have been pumping with bellows for the last three months.

We’re talking about a few drops of blood every few weeks. Within a few minutes, anyone who has blood drawn for a drug test has fully regenerated it.

Any assertion that Pacquiao might be weakened because he has blood drawn a few times in a 10-week period before a fight is either deception or ignorance. But not both.

Here’s another suggestion: Set the pre-fight testing schedule so both fighters get tested randomly once between Jan. 1-15, again between Jan. 16-31, again between Feb. 1-15, and once more between Feb. 16-March 6. That guarantees no testing in the final seven days before the fight, only four pre-fight tests in total, and the randomness which is at the core of the Mayweather camp’s demands.

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Here’s another suggestion: Let the drug-testers stand there every day during sparring, and the first time Pacquiao gets a fat lip or bloody nose, just squeeze some into a vial.

That’s how asinine the Pacquiao camp’s claims look in a business where lost blood is a day-to-day job hazard.

Failing that, someone really is weaseling out of the fight.

And that someone isn’t Floyd Mayweather.

Pacquiao is not hiding anything...
He is not the likes of Shame Mosley or Fernando Vargasteroids.

100 Facts (pt. 1)?

Jun 30, 2007 by sweetxoblivion | Posted in Jokes & Riddles

There are more cars in Southern California than there are cows in India.

The two-foot long bird called a Kea that lives in New Zealand likes to eat the strips of rubber around car windows.

The province of Alberta, Canada is completely free of rats.

Illinois has the most personalized license plates of any state.

If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle; if the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle; if the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.

There are two credit cards for every person in the United States.

The international telephone dialing code for Antarctica is 672.

The average chocolate bar has 8 insect legs in it.

There are 206 bones in the adult human body, but 300 in children (some of the bones fuse together as a child grows).

Fleas can jump 130 times higher than their own height. In human terms this is equal to a 6 foot person jumping 780 feet into the air.

Snakes are true carnivores as they eat nothing but other animals. They do not eat any type of plant material.

There are no poisonous snakes in Maine.

The blue whale can produce sounds up to 188 decibels. This is the loudest sound produced by a living animal and has been detected as far away as 530 miles.

The human eye blinks an average of 4,200,000 times a year.

It takes approximately 12 hours for food to entirely digest.

Erosion at the base of Niagara Falls (USA) undermines the shale cliffs and as a result, the falls have receded approximately 7 miles over the last 10,000 years.

The longest living cells in the body are brain cells which can live an entire lifetime.

The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building.

North Dakota has never had an earthquake.

Alexander Graham Bell (who invented the telephone) also set a world water-speed record of over seventy miles an hour at the age of 72.

There is enough fuel in a full tank of a jumbo jet to drive an average car four times around the world.

Hawaii is moving toward Japan 4 inches every year.

Chimps are the only animals that can recognize themselves in a mirror.

The leg bones of a bat are so thin that no bat can walk.

There are more living organisms on the skin of a single human being than there are human beings on the surface of the earth.

Ants do not sleep.

Marilyn Monroe had six toes on one foot.

If you keep a goldfish in the dark room, it will eventually turn white.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed to speak.

Almonds are members of the peach family.

Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable.

Americans on the average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.

One person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.

More people are killed by donkeys annually than are killed in plane crashes.

Lorne Greene had one of his nipples bitten off by an alligator while he was host of "Lorne Greene's Animal Kingdom".

The dot that appears over the letter "i" is called a tittle.

All major league baseball umpires must wear black underwear while on the job (in case their pants split).

The Spanish word esposa means "wife." The plural, esposas, means "wives," but also "handcuffs."

If all Americans used one third less ice in their drinks the United States would become a net exporter instead of an importer of energy.

If the Nile River were stretched across the United States, it would run nearly from New York to Los Angeles.

San Francisco cable cars are the only National Monuments that move.

The Hoover Dam was built to last 2,000 years. Its concrete will not be fully cured for another 500 years.

Abraham Lincoln's dog, Fido, was assassinated too.

All of David Letterman's suits are custom made - there are no creases in his suit trousers.

Cranberry Jell-O is the only flavor that contains real fruit flavoring.

Fewer than half of the 16,200 major league baseball players have ever hit a home run.

In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.

Richard Versalle, a tenor performing at New York's Metropolitan Opera House, suffered a heart attack and fell 10 feet from a ladder to the stage just after singing the line "You can only live so long."

If the entire population of earth was reduced to exactly 100 people, 51% would be female, 49% male; 50% of the world's currency would be held by 6 people, one person would be nearly dead, one nearly born.

In 1920, Babe Ruth out-homered every American League team.

Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England, but only in tropical fish stores.

Toxic house plants poison more children than household chemicals.

The original name of Bank of America was Bank of Italy.

The ant, when intoxicated, will always fall over to its right side.

The California Department of Motor Vehicles has issued six driver's licenses to six different people named Jesus Christ.

Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike each year than all the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.

People in China and Japan die disproportionately on the 4th of each month because the words death and four sound alike, and they are represented by the same symbol.

Chicago is closer to Moscow than it is to Rio de Janeiro.

Dogs have two sets of teeth, just like humans. They first have 30 "puppy" teeth, then 42 adult teeth.

In 1950, President Harry Truman threw out the first ball twice at the opening day Washington DC baseball game; once right handed and once left handed.

A Swiss ski resort announced it would combat global warming by wrapping its mountain glaciers in aluminum foil to keep them from melting.

The chameleon has a tongue that is one and a half times the length of his body.

Beethoven dipped his head in cold water before he composed.

There once was a town named "6" in West Virginia.

Ten years ago, only 500 people in China could ski. This year, an estimated 5,000,000 Chinese will visit ski resorts.

In 1920, Babe Ruth broke the single season home run record, with 29. The same year, he became the first major leaguer to hit 30 home runs. The same year, he became the first major leaguer to hit 40 home runs. The same year, he became the first major leaguer to hit 50 home runs.

A Nigerian woman was caught entering the UK with 104 kg of snails in her baggage.

Profanity is typically cut from in-flight movies to make them suitable for general audiences. Fox Searchlight Pictures has substituted "Ashcroft" for "A**hole" in the movie Sideways when dubbed for Aerolineas Argentinas flights.

Author Hunter S. Thompson, who committed suicide recently, wanted to be cremated and his ashes to be shot out of a cannon on his ranch.

Sports Illustrated magazine allows subscribers to opt out of receiving the famous swimsuit issue each year. Fewer than 1% choose this option.

There is a company that will (for $14,000) take your ashes, compress them into a synthetic diamond to be set in jewelry for a loved one.

The RIAA sued an 83 year old woman for downloading music illegally, even though a copy of her death certificate was sent to the RIAA a week before it filed the suit.

Two 1903 paintings recently sold at auction for $590,000 - the paintings were in the famous "Dogs Playing Poker" series.

Russian scientists have developed a new drug that prolongs drunkenness and enhances intoxication.

Romanian firefighters could not get their trucks close enough to a burning building, so they put out the fire by throwing snowballs at it.

A perfect SAT score is 1600 combined. Bill Gates scored 1590 on his SAT. Paul Allen, Bill's partner in Microsoft, scored a perfect 1600. Bill Cosby scored less than 500 combined.

Motorists traveling outside Salem, Oregon saw one of the "litter cleanup" signs crediting the American Nazi party. Marion County officials had no choice but to let that group into the adopt-a-road program. The $500 per sign was picked up by Oregon taxpayers. The Ku Klux Klan is also involved in the adopt-a-road program in the state of Arkansas.

Spam filters that catch the word "cialis" will not allow many work-related e-mails through because that word is embedded inside the word "specialist".

McDonald's restaurants will buy 54,000,000 pounds of fresh apples this year. Two years ago, McDonald's purchased 0 pounds of apples. This is attributed to the shift to more healthy menu options (the Apple Pie, which has been at McDonald's for years uses processed Apple Pie Filling).

The biggest dog on record was an Old English Mastiff that weighed 343 pounds. He was 8 feet, 3 inches from nose to tail.

Mailmen in Russia now carry revolvers after a recent decision by the government.

All of Queen Anne's 17 children died before she did.

There are over 87,000 Americans on waiting lists for organ transplants.

American made parts account for only 1% of the Chrysler Crossfire. 96% of the Ford F-150 Heritage Truck is American.

A Dutch court ruled that a bank robber could deduct the 2,000 Euros he paid for his pistol from the 6,600 Euros he has to return to the bank he robbed.

Only 6% of the autographs in circulation from members of the Beatles are estimated to be real.

The time spent deleting SPAM costs United States businesses $21.6 billion annually.

60.7 percent of eligible voters participated in the 2004 presidential election, the highest percentage in 36 years. However, more than 78 million did not vote. This means President Bush won re-election by receiving votes from less than 31% of all eligible voters in the United States.

John Quincy Adams, sixth president of the United States, loved to skinny dip in the Potomac River.

La Paz, Bolivia has an average annual temperature below 50 degrees Fahrenheit. However, it has never recorded a zero-degree temperature. Same for Stanley, Falkland Islands and Punta Arenas, Chile.

41% of Chinese people eat at least once a week at a fast food restaurant. 35% of Americans do.

A Wisconsin forklift operator for a Miller beer distributor was fired when a picture was published in a newspaper showing him drinking a Bud Light.

G-rated family films earn more money than any other rating. Yet only 3% of Hollywood's output is G-rated.

Richard Hatch, winner of the first "Survivor" reality series, has been charged with tax evasion for failing to report his $1,000,000 prize.

The entire fleet of Unicoi County Tennessee's salt trucks was rendered out of commission in one accident. All three trucks were badly damaged when one of them began skidding down a road, causing a chain reaction accident. Officials blamed road conditions.

More people study English in China than speak it in the United States of America (300 million).

Fast food provider Hardee's has recently introduced the Monster Thickburger. It has 1,420 calories and 107 grams of fat.
Sorry it's so long lol. Something to do right?
And yes....PART ONE!!!!
More will come....eventually...

Thanks!! I love learning random facts to tell my friends! They always wonder how I find things like that out!!

Is this story good? Tell the truth!?

Oct 08, 2009 by Lauren | Posted in Books & Authors

Just read it please. (:



If my friends saw me here, my life would be ruined. Los Angeles is where I belong, it hold my life. LA holds all my secrets,
my boyfriends, my house, my friends, and of course my dad. Im what the kids call a "rich girl", I know that too. Shopping almost everyday of the week
In your red porche with your own visa was pretty sweet. But now, its all changing.
Three years ago, I started noticing how my parents always aruged. It started on my thirteenth Birthday party. Everybody was starting to get
a turn at hitting the crown shaped pinata. While I was getting blindfolded by my uncle, I saw my parents behind the screen door. They looked as
If they were screaming at eachother. I looked up at my uncle, wondering what was wrong. Since he knew i didnt understand what was really going on,
He just told me that "They were only aruging like any normal married couple". Being only thirteen, I believed my uncle.
But looking back on it now, I remember them fighting constantly. Sometimes my dad wouldnt come home after work.
My mom used to tell me that he was only working late. But as I lay awake on those nights with the door cracked open,
I realized that as hours passed, he still wouldn't be home.
In late September, my parents filed for divorce. Worst thing to almost ever happen to me. Besides the time I lost my credit card
for about a whole week.
Trees. Trees. Trees. Its all I can possibly see, while looking out the passengers seat window In my moms lincoln Navigator.
I see a big green sign up ahead:

CULPEPER COUNTY17 Miles


My face starts feeling hot. Great, only 17 miles until Im in Dullpeper, Virginia. I push the little black
button and crack my window.
"Good Job Hailey, Im glad your able to atleast let the smell of Virginia get in Your nose." My mom said sarcasticly

I started to take my first whiff of Virginia. Ew. All I can smell is a mix between Smoke and cow manuire. I quickly
roll my window up before it invades the car.

"Mom, Why did we have to move, here? Of all places, Virginia?! I mean seriously, why couldnt we stay in California.
Thats where I grew up, and where I wanna be!" I said

"Come on honey, atleast give Virginia a shot. It may not be the biggest town, but you will make new friends."

"You will make new friends" I thought in my head, that classic line I used to laugh at in alll the movies.
Well, I dont find this too funny now.

"Mom, I had my own friends In LA. Why would I want to be friends with all the rednecks here?!"

"Hailey, now stop. Give it a chance.. Those people you call 'rednecks' might be thinking the same thing about you. And Culpeper isnt
all rednecks. Only a few. You will find some new pretty friends, and maybe even a handsome new boyfriend."

I look at my mom and shutter at what just came out of her mouth. I dont even want to think about any of that.

"Look Hales. Were here." My mom says

I lean to the right a little and see a sign that says.,

YOU ARE NOW ENTERING CULPEPER COUNTY

To me, the sign more says.

YOU ARE NOW ENTERING THE WORST TIME OF YOUR LIFE

end chapter.

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